I am teaching my colleague how to clinically code

[Bbbananas]

patients' medical and surgical history.

I told her the story of the old lady and her cute vagina (acute angina... it's an old joke). She didn't get it.

But she did think that manual evacuation was someone shouting "Fire... Get Out Of The Building"....

What other medical misnomers or mispronounciations have you come across?

[milly143]

I remember going into a chemist and asking for something (I wish I could remember what now) but apparently she confused what I had actually said with Anusal. I was quite embarrased when she produced it at the counter with a queue of people around me.

[Bbbananas]

My mum sent me up to the chemist when I was about 10, and told me to ask for Lanacane. I saw the packet where it said "for vaginal itching". I was mortified. Soooo mad at my mum !!

If only I knew then what I would turn into ???!!!!!

[McMouse]

My mother thought colonic irrigation was something I'd rigged up in the greenhouse for when we were away.

[Bbbananas]

This is not medically-related at all pixi - but I know what you mean. I have never been able to say the word 'vinegar'. It comes out as 'viggegar'.

[milly143]

ha ha. That's cruel!

When I started getting my periods I was so embarrassed about it I used to make one of my sisters go and buy sanitary towels for me. By the time I had reached adulthood I took pride in making sure I picked the check out with the young boy working on there to see if he would blush at having to handle all my girly products.

[ClareA]

Until recently I worked in a hospital's medical records library. Some of the gaffes made by staff would be tragic if they weren't so funny. I've seen 'stomach' written as 'stumac', and 'glans' as 'glands', for two.

[Bbbananas]

pmsl McM - that's the sort of thing my nan would have come out with. She had some priceless gems - do you call them malapropisms or something? She used to tell everyone she was bisexual and did it well with either of them (she meant ambidextrous).

[ChuckFickens]

If you don't mind I will continue to think that a manual evacuation is someone shouting "Fire... Get Out Of The Building"....

My mind feels much happier with that thought.

[Bbbananas]

Yer what love?!! Not picking on you, you daft mare, I was laughing with you, not at you :-(

[Bbbananas]

Chuck: quite right. Man Evac is a really sh1tty thing to have to do. I admire these district nurses ;-)

[yinyang]

My gran came back from the doctors and announced calmly she had a touch of leukemia. Thankfully she explained she had been given some iron tablets to sort it out.

[Jemisa]

This is not a word of a lie.
On leaving school I worked in a local factory for a while as did lots of school leavers. all of us 15 - 16 years old. A girl on the assembly line complained of feeling unwell had a headache etc. the superviser sent her to the Nurse.
The nurse thought she may have started her periods & gave her 2 aspro's and a sanitary towel and told her to use it.
Evidently this girl didn't know what the nurse meant, she took the aspro's but the towel she thought was for her headache, put it on her forehead looped the loops over her ears & came back on line.
That girl learnt a lot that day. (true)

jem

[anneasquith]

my friends mother thought ENEMA was a lovely name for her new baby !

[Bbbananas]

Ah Jem, bless her little heart !!

[wheaten]

Well, not medical, but i asked a colleague to point her mouse at the screen and she physically picked up the mouse and pointed it at the screen!

[Jemisa]

What a difference 50 years make eh?

jem