Why Are Some People So Unfriendly?

[Patsy33]

My daughter was very upset last night. Her neighbour always moans about something. She had a go at daughter's other half about something trivial, re- making a noise, putting logs on the fire! Also my daughter putting the washing machine on at 8.00 pm.., and my little 3 year old grandson making a noise in the bath..She is so unfriendly. She looks bitter & twisted..
I told them to ignore her. It's sad to know my daughter is upset. She is so kind & friendly, and would help anyone.
I think my daughter should have said, "Pardon me for living".... Unbelievable!

[Mamyalynne]

It is sad Patsy, I can understand your feelings - maybe the neighbour is lonely and the ordinary sounds of family life intensify that.

[andy-hughes]

Some people just go through life being miserable, and putting considerable effort into making others around them as miserable as they are.

Encourage your daughter to be friendly - a war of attrition with neighbours is a dreadful scenario, and to be avoided at all costs.

[Ellipsis]

> I told them to ignore her.

No, tell her to eff right off. Or, if you want to be more pleasant, to take her to take a long, hard look at herself, moaning about 3 year olds having a bath. Do not put up with that kind of crap.

[Mamyalynne]

You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, bake a few biscuits and say 'Sorry our little family is upsetting your peace and quiet but we are only trying to lead a normal life'.

[Ellipsis]

... so eff off and I hope you choke on these, you old bat.

[Mamyalynne]

You mistake me for someone else Ellipsis :-)

[Ellipsis]

Hehe

[Atheist]

Ellipsis, you are making yourself sound like the same kind of person as Patsy's neighbour.

[Patsy33]

I think her other half probably told her to "go away"... He would give as good as he gets.
My daughter has gone out of her way in the past to appease her, by buying a bunch of flowers for her once for taking in a parcel for her. I personally think she is jealous of them, she has been divorced for years. Her ex was horrible. So there might be something in what you said, Mamya.
I'm hoping for them to keep the peace, as her son is a bit if a hard guy, and wouldn't want to get on the wrong side of him. Saying that, he and his sister don't bother with her much. When you live in a small village, everyone knows everybody's else's business!

[Ellipsis]

Atheist, my post at 19:07 was a light-hearted jest and if you could not see it as such then I'm sorry. My post at 18:54 was serious, however.

[zylaphone]

I would go with Mamalynnes suggestion

[rowanwitch]

Do they live in houses or flats, it's in our residents handbook that we shouldn't use a washing machine between 8pm and 8am, a real pain when you have a machine with a built in timer and can't take advantage of the cheap rate on economy 7. If soundproofing is that poor it's probably worth looking at ways it can be improved. When you are on your own other people's noises can seem far worse than you 'd imagine.

[weecalf]

Tell the neighbour to watch less of the soaps that’s what’s been upsetting her .watching Lux .Dove and Cherry blossom is it is doing her head in like .

[Prudie]

I'm so pleased rowan has put an alternative view. If walls are thin and one is stressed then noise from neighbours can be unbearable, even if it's normal noise like washing machines, TV, children, even footsteps on the floor. Maybe consider if this is a contributory factor to what you perceive as unpleasantness.

[Ellipsis]

If you live in a house with thin walls, moaning about the noise a neighbour's three year old makes in the bath is mean spirited, unless it's at 3am ..

[Patsy33]

They are old terrace houses.
I have given thought to the noise being worse for someone on their own, etc.
She seems to be getting worse. If it wasn't the noise it would be something else.
My daughter and partner have been thinking of moving for quite some time now. They are having their little house valued soon. It's very expensive around here, so they will be limited.

[Smowball]

Patsy, is your daughters neighbour elderly?

[Patsy33]

About 75. She looks quite good for her age, just a sore face. I think she has a couple of health issues. She's always working on her garden though.

[Patsy33]

Sour! :-)

[Smowball]

I really feel for your daughter. Age is no need to be rude, and tbh that’s what her neighbour is doing. I mean, the little boy is too noisy in the bath!??