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Deafness can be confusing.....

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craft1948 | 00:08 Tue 02nd Feb 2010 | Jokes
58 Answers
Skinny little white guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this
HUGE black guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring
at him looks down and says: "7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch private,
3 pound testicles, Turner Brown."
The little guy faints and falls to the floor..

The big guy kneels down and brings him to, shaking him. The big guy
says: "What's wrong with you?"
In a weak voice the little guy says, "What EXACTLY did you say to me?
The big dude says: "I saw your curious look and figured I'd just give
you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. I'm 7 feet tall,
I weigh 350 pounds, I have a 20 inch private, my testicles weigh 3
pounds each, and my name is Turner Brown."

The small guy says: "Turner Brown?!...Sweet Jesus, I thought you said,
"Turn around."
  
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Is that what they mean by Lipservice?
Question Author
very good chaps.....
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Question Author
very good nokno.....I'd give you stars if I could......
If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
Question Author
rofl....
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<Chuckles>

I'm rubbish at telling jokes but these all made me laugh :c)
A husband suspects that his wife is going deaf, so he does something to test her.
He sits in his usual chair in the t.v room while his wife sits on the couch and whispers very silently to her"Honey? can you pass the remote?" She doesn't say anything. So for a second time just a little louder he says "Honey? Can you pass me the remote?" Still nothing
For the third time he picks up his voice and actually shouts a little and says "Honey?! Can you pass me the remote?!"
The wife turns to him and says "For the third time Harold, it's on the arm of your chair"
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Question Author
okay...I give up......mine wasn't that funny.............
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They probably can't read them, UNLESS WE SHOUT!
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Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?" Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.'" The doctor said, "I didn't say that. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur. Be careful.'
Question Author
rofl Androcles...excellent...

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