Is It Morbid To Plan Your Own Send Off?

nailedit | 18:36 Thu 27th Jul 2023 | ChatterBank

25 Answers

My mother did, 2 years ago, but she knew that she was dying.
She was 88
I'm 57 but know that I could expire at anytime.
(Especially given my present lifestyle)
Not like when you're a teenager and life goes on forever.
Thoughts?

My Stupid, Selfish Friend

Fao Zacs

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bobbinwales

We probably all think about it at some stage, I have already started to set out some wishes.... even down to suggesting music... but its not something i think about alot. just now and again

-SharonA-

I am older than you so these things need to be sorted.
I have arranged for a Pure cremation. My other wishes my boys know what to do.

roopower

My friend doesn't want her daughter to be burdened with all the planning so she has a pure cremation lined up. I am a bit sad as my father didn't want a funeral and it was difficult not being able to say goodbye.

furrypusscat

If you make your own plans, there's a good chance you will get what you want and how you want it.

Buenchico

A direct copy-&-paste from my will:
"I desire that my body be cremated without ceremony and that my ashes be disposed of, also without ceremony, in any convenient refuse receptacle"

For those who'd prefer a 'proper send off' though, I see nothing morbid about making plans for it.

rowanwitch

I started future proofing when I wrote my first will and took out life insurance at 18, I have a folder with instructions for insurance policy, funeral, (simple cremation) and mine and Dave's ashes to be scattered at sea details of up to date boat charter company etc. A list of online sites to post a goodbye message with phone numbers of at least one active member to give a confirmation message so we don't have any misunderstandings.
I will probably outlive my remaining family so for me arrangements are important.

barry1010

We have planned our funerals and ringfenced the money - we don't trust any company not to go bust. They are covered by the FCA now but it's a faff it they go bust at the wrong time

anneasquith

I think our families feel uncomfortable when we talk of our own death ( understandable). But I don’t think it’s morbid . Just being practical .

Geoffrey13

After my mother died, as Executor of her Will it truly brought home to me the possible complexities involved.

As her life was far simpler than mine, I decided to make a Will, and I also compiled a file of further assistance in dealing with my aftermath for my surviving family (e.g. bank account details, policies held, etc.). My funeral is already paid for with the Co-op (notwithstanding Barry's comment). Maybe it is morbid, but then that's death anyway.

jourdain2

A friend in France was a bereavement counsellor. Her advice was to plan as much as you could, because it helped those you left very much and saved a lot of stress. N.B. She became a CRUISE counsellor after the sudden death of her 19 yr. old daughter in a riding accident - so she knew what she was talking about.

Having said that - I've been trying to get Mr. J2 to pick the music he wants for over 6 yrs now! We have sorted out burials though.

andy-hughes

It can be seen as 'morbid' but increasingly, society is accepting the need and practicality of planning for the inevitable.

jourdain2

^^^^ grrr CRUSE (I think!)

ladybirder

Yes I've got mine all sorted and paid for. I told my children what I was doing and they were OK with it.

retrocop

Not at all. After my mother died I was the executor. I was the younger of her kids. My sister lived in Canada. I found an envelope in her belongings outlining her requirements on her demise. I found it most helpful and considerate from a dear lady who always considered other people before herself. I shed a tear when she requested that my sister and I should be kind to each other. We had our disputes! I-read that request at her funeral. My only regret was that I couldn't get a choir at the Crem to sing the *** ritual ‘Going Home’. She loved listening to the song when my Dad ,who went before her, sang it as a member of the Porthcawl Male voice Choir. An audio tape sufficed.
I will follow her example knowing it will be of assistance to my surviving family.

retrocop

For christ sake. Black slave song instead of N***o