Advice For Midnight Revellers

[Dear-Doris]

Happy New Year Campers

Just a few words of advice if you are about to go out partying ...

* don't eat the diced carrots

* don't put anything inside you that may be difficult to get out again

* be very cautious if a man asks you if you'd like some sausage

but most important of all

* do not 'dad dance' to Abba - there are a lot of mobile phone cameras out there


Doris xx

[email protected]

[ "A problem shared is ... a problem two people have" ]

[tonyav]

Dear Doris, is it ok to dance to Agadoo though ?.

[Slapshot]

Thanks Doris...do you have advice for those working over the bells???

[humbersloop]

any advice on sling backs Doris?

[sunny-dave]

Dear Tiny - just watch where you push that pineapple

[shoota]

And don't swap spit with anyone who has recently returned from Africa....

[Dear-Doris]

All dancing is banned - unless you are too drunk to stand up ...

[Dear-Doris]

My Dear Slappy - you may play with your own bells for ten minutes, if you have a fag break.

[tonyav]

* don't put anything inside you that may be difficult to get out again


Will do, sinny dave ;-)

[Slapshot]

I don't smoke Doris......

[Dear-Doris]

Dear Miss Sloop

White slingbacks are allowable between consenting adults when the moon can be seen over the Humber Estuary ... please avoid getting Gooled though.

Doris xx

[Dear-Doris]

That's not what I've heard Mr Sslapshortt ...

[tonyav]

Well I'll do the smoking for you then, Slappy.

[Slapshot]

Has Psybbo been emailing you again Dear - Doris....

[Psybbo]

Dear Doris, do you have any advice for climbing the stairs in 2015?

[humbersloop]

sorry, I meant hatchbacks

[Psybbo]

Oi, Slappy!

[shoota]

Are they some kind of pyjama bottoms sloop?

[Dear-Doris]

If you can pull Quasimodo, then you go right ahead ...

[humbersloop]

yes shoota, they're called a humbersleep ;)

[Dear-Doris]

I advise the new "Stannah Alzheimer", psybbo - gets you to the top before you forget what the feck you are going up for ...