where do i stand

[staci]

my children currently live with their dad cos of schools etc. they both want to come and live with me, they are 10 and 8. we currently have no court orders in place. i would rather avoid court if possible. he wont hear of them moving in with me, mainly due to his new fiancee telling him so. can i just take them to live with me or will that be classsed as kidnapping? can he legaly stop me?

[Shadow Man]

Unless a resident care order is in place (or a court order etc) you can not kidnapp your children as such.

However due to the delicate situation and a possible fracas in front of your kids, I would advise seeing a solicitor. If there is no history with you being a bad parent or no evidence of any drugs etc, then there is not a court in the land who would favour the father over the mother.

[staci]

there is no reason what so ever that the children should not be with me, no drugs, violence or anything, simply logistics at the time of the break up, nearly three years ago. in that time i have had them fri to monday and every single day of every single school hollidays. he gets all the child bennefit stuff which he can keep quite fankly, i just want them back.

because of his new missus being very bitchy and horrible( i have already blocked her number) i just feel like taking them to live with me and then letting him know after the fact.

[Shadow Man]

Yes you can just take them. But............and this is a big but. If he gets funny, this could be used against you. He may state your are impulsive and unrational etc.

[staci]

hmmm, thats the only reason i have not done it so far.

[bednobs]

Imagine the positions were reversed - you had custody of the children ansd one day they were just taken from you! How do you know what his fiancee tells him? How do you know he dosent want them of his own accord?

[staci]

oh he does want them of his own accord i know that, my issue with his new fiancee is that she has been controlling from the start and changing things that were working perfectly well just to suit herself then stamping her feet and threatening to split up with him if she doesnt get her own way. my ex is working longer and longer hours so is with the kids less and less.
i wouild hate it if the situations were reversed but i would not have been changing things such as contact times and places constantly. nor being horrible and involving the kids in any disputes or bad mouthing wich she does all the time.
i did not want to go into all the details and ins and outs of the weorkings of our relationships, i simply wanted advice on where i stood from a legal standpoint.
thank you to those of you who give it.

[kittywoo]

hi

i have been in this position but reversed.. my ex took my daughter before we got divorced without permision and i called the police they said it was a civil matter as there was no oreder in place and it took three months to get her back my daughter was 2 at the time and not aware of the situation.. if your children want to live back with you and they are of a reasonanle age to decide a court would take this into consideration. a caffcas officer would be put in place to advise the court after speeking to all parties involved i would approach this properly through a solicitor and get proper advice.. the court would take many things into consideration such as the upheavel their education etc etc.... hope this helps! good luck!

[staci]

thank you