gobsmacked by so many dreadful job applications!

[joko]

I am amazed how can people be so ignorant in how to apply for a job these days - there is no excuse really is there? - i mean the net is full of advice etc and most of it is common sense.
It so competetive its crazy not to put any proper effort in.
Some of it is quite comical and i'd laugh if i didnt have to wade through them and delete them haha.

My instinct is to write back and politely tell them why i will not be taking their app any further - but then it actually helps me whittle them down - makes it easy for me to see what theyre really like, so i am loathe to point it out to them ... i have for a few though, couldnt resist lol.

aside from the usual bad grammar, weird formatting, spelling errors, lack of punctuation, and obviously text speak, i have had applications for all sorts of other roles than the ones i asked for - no idea why they would think i would have any say in hiring for other depts - even got one from a director today!
Its clear many havent even read the post properly as they live in the wrong area, or dont drive etc.

ive had one or two saying they've had no experience but would like to try anything because they love films! they say, "i am willing to give anything a go"
well that fills me with confidence doesnt it!

i have had sentences in cover letters that are clearly specifically meant for other previous applications that they havent bothered to check and remove - one even blamed the website for stitching him up ...(!)

and why do so many email me just asking for more info on the project?
no cv or proper letter - just wanting me to call them or explain the project to them.
i dont think they seem to undertsand that they are meant to be selling themselves to me, not the other way round.
why would i waste my time explaining it all to them, only to then find they are not suitable - if they cant even be bothered to write a proper application then i cant be bothered to chase them up

ive had - "hi, saw your ad, tell me more" - thats is, nothing else...

also 'your ad sounds interesting, i am local, can you give me more information?' ... nothing else.

a few of them dont even sign it or use any sort of greeting.

they also keep telling me they really really want to learn, and try new things etc and are therefore perfect for the job - yet they want a main position rather than assistant!
why so they think thats what i want to hear? i am not really interested in what 'you want' - that doesnt help get the job done - i need them to be able to do the job already.
i am not a teacher and dont have time help them learn - and obviously also then have to watch over them, and correct their errors etc
you wouldnt hire an inexperienced plumber to do a proper job alone, just because he wants to learn would you?

i have even got 1 from another country saying - "i would love to work abroad, i love travel, give me a shout" ... thats it!

i am gobsmacked that these people ever get work.

(this is freelance film work by the way so a very different ball game to working for a company long term etc)

no question particularly except - anyone else had this sort of thing?

is it not a standard thing? - CV and a cover letter - that sells you to the person.

(sorry for the moan haha)
cheers

[bednobs]

errr there is a difference between a job application and an internet forum people

[Mick-Talbot]

I would definitely have used a spellchecker posting a thread like this

I think a few of ''''''''''' these things are missing too.

[emmie]

lots of replies and not that many who actually understand what you are getting at, strangely enough i do. It's the same when i listen to many young people, it's as though basic English doesn't exist, that they can only speak in this shorthand, even text speak, as for innit, don't get me started.

[wiltsman]

Is it me? Why has no-one commented on the number of posters, who when writing about themselves, they write i instead of I. We're not doing text speak on here.

Also Joko, why don't your sentences start with a capital letter? For some-one who writes about bad grammar, weird formatting, spelling errors, lack of punctuation etc, I thought you would have taken a bit more care in your post.

Apart from that, I do agree with most things you say on this subject.

[Mick-Talbot]

I'm am going to read this thread now, I love it when Joko goes on the attack. (fingers crossed someone got an ear bashing)

[emmie]

because the post does not have to be written like a job application. How many on here are in such a hurry to post a reply they don't check their spelling, grammar, or much besides.

[Mick-Talbot]

I'm am

? lol

[emmie]

see ^^

[tonyav]

Weirdo's.

[emmie]

who is ^^

[lcg]

wow....there are some really grumpy people in here getting on their high horse! i always write in lower case on ab, principally because i am quite lazy and it isn't a job application. there is nothing wrong with the original post and having seen some shocking cv's/applications myself (in the nursing field) am also shocked at the state of people's spelling, grammar and self-representation in the job market. my son (19) can only use the 3 r's because we (my hubby and i) taught him to do so. his school was absolutely shocking in the way they taught basic skills and many of his peers have awful handwriting that you can't understand and use text speak as regular language. many others simply have no written skills at all. joko is perfectly entitled to moan about such crap applications as they pour in for every job - and it becomes extremely tiring wading through all the rubbish to get to the few people who actually bother to apply properly. i have loads of sympathy for her and hope she gets a good giggle every now and then from the funny ones x

[Mick-Talbot]

Even Jack-the-hat comes in for some stick and she hasn't even posted.


joko

Question Author

lol - oh yes jth - its aaallll my fault ... given that these people are responding to a job app, it has nothing to do with me personally who responds.
what a stupid thing to say.

[joko]

oops well spotted mick - i meant jtp! sorry jth!

[humbersloop]

I've been searching unsuccessfully for the David Brent clip where he bins half the application forms :(

I had a cracker cv from an american woman "looking to relocate to England, UK." It went on for yards, detailing her hobby working as Sparkle the Clown, and directing me to her home page. That featured a very slow loading picture of Papa Ratzinger on the Vatican balcony with the hallelujah chorus playing loudly. It went down a storm in our office, for all the wrong reasons really.

[joko]

Jeezo - I cant be bothered to keep pointing this out - it doesnt matter on here - i cant be bothered to add '''''' or capitals, or double check everything etc - lifes too short.

you know why? because i am not trying to get a job out of any of you or impress you, so it doesnt matter whether you like my punctuation etc...

oh the irony of people defending job applicants with lazy slapdash approaches, yet moaning about standards on here!
haha, got it the wrong way round there

another irony - me being peeved that people reply for a job without having even read the post properly, and people on here doing exactly the same thing - haha

so, for everyone who is having trouble understanding what my OP was actually about, here is one of the opening sentences -

"ASIDE from the usual bad grammar, weird formatting, spelling errors, lack of punctuation, and obviously text speak, i have had ... "

Hopefully now its clear that my post is in regards to OTHER THINGS.
Hopefully now its clear that bad grammar and spelling etc happen all the time in job apps - and that its actually the thing that bothers me LEAST - hence why i didnt actually moan about...

and yes, when it comes to me paying someone a very good fee for a job - i do expect higher standards as befits the job offered.... why wouldnt i?
it makes me laugh that you think i shouldnt care...

thanks to other responded to the actual post rather than trying to be petty.

(Many years ago, I received diplomas in proofreading and creative writing from the regent academy - so i can and do write well - when i choose to and when i need to... like when i want a job)

[maggiebee]

If this is your standard of English and punctuation Joko, I'm afraid I wouldn't want a job with any firm that employed you.

[joko]

*sigh ... haha
no maggie its not my standard - i save that for important things - but if internet chatroom forums are how you look for a job, and you can't be bothered to actually read what you are replying to then I would not employ you anyway...

[Nibble]

i kno wot u need fur an worker i cud do ya job no prob -





wen kin i beg-in



plz git bak to uz ♥♥



Only Joking :)

[Mick-Talbot]

Surely it is habit forming though, Joko?

[joko]

haha nibble, its not all that from the truth on occasion