How to get through a break up...

[CAJ1]

I am looking for your wisdom here lovely ABers! Split up with my OH on Sunday, moved out on Monday into a new place which is unfurnished. No furniture and not much money and I feel so crap at mo, any advice on getting back to normal. I think I have hit the chocolate/ice cream eating stage...

[bednobs]

sorry, i dont have advice but well donef or doing it :)

[mccfluff]

Get some friends round, drink wine, eat icecream. It will take time but you'll get there :-)

[craft1948]

lol triggs...........that got me through "the pain"..........

[AB Editor]

I suggest you grab a nearby friend to go furniture hunting - always fun to look for the kind of thing you might want (even if you can't walk out with it!).

Also, remember, you can pick something he would have bloody hated.

[CAJ1]

Thanks bednobs, I'm glad I did it but that feeling slowly wears off lol - not going back though I promise!

I'm on the right tracks mccfluff, I forgot how pants this feeling is but I know it'll pass!

lol, I like it triggerhippy! ;-)

[emmie]

don't do anything rash, take time to settle in, and in time you will relish your own space, doing your own thing. Things like furniture can be had for a song, if you know where to look, ask friends, family, even temporary stuff, until the time comes when you can afford better quality. Don't binge on food or booze, because when it comes down to it, you will wake up 6 months down the line, be several stone heavier, and no happier. This may sound odd, but have friends round for a celebration, to the start of your new life. Good Luck

[CAJ1]

Good idea AB Ed. When we lived together I had a big canvas print that he hated so it was stashed in the spare room and when I moved, I said to him at least I can put this back on the wall now to which he said...that's why your leaving me lol

[CAJ1]

Thanks for the advice em10, it all seems strange at the moment having a whole house to myself, it will take some getting used to. I'm not too fussy about if stuff is second hand till I get back on my feet, I literally have nothing anymore and can't afford to get everything new straight away. I can get away with a little bit of comfort eating as I've lost 1 1/2 stone stressing and I'm about a stone less than I want to be

[chinadog]

I feel for you CAJ, Im recently seperated June) ,my OH decided he wanted to be single again after 29 years of marriage. I was in a right state,crying day and night but day by day the tears got less and less and i started going out with friends. Were you married or living together? You should be entitled to your half of the furniture at least. Go out even if its just once a week. Good luck.

[chinadog]

Btw I've lost 17ibs with Slimming World since he left and feel tons better for it.

[Bobbisox]

CAJ truly sorry it ended this way, on a lighter note, there's nothing like a split for losing weight, best diet invented imo, so chin up it's a big wide world out there for you
take care
Bobbi xx

[mccfluff]

try freecycle you'll prob be able to pick up a load of stuff for free

[pa___ul3]

use it to start again, it's all about you and the future now so think about what you want and who you want to be with nothing holding you back! Get out running or get the gym, great for clearing the mind as well as getting fit, although, whenever you're ready for that, the gym is better for having a perve or getting to meet someone. Or as it's nearly september, get looking at evening classes or something. It's all about the new chapter so start thinking about where you want it to go!

[CAJ1]

Its crap isn't it chinadog, I suppose as they say what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger! Well done on the weight loss!

Thanks bobbi, it wasn't meant to end this way. He was meant to be the one, its just he must have put on a front the first few years or I was so blinded by love I didn't see all the little things that now annoy me. It is a big world, scary but exciting! xx

Thanks mccfluff, will check that out :)

pa___ul3, you are right. I could do a course, good thinking! I enjoy running so was thinking I might train and run a marathon again next year. I've been to our gym...not much to perve at down there lol!

[Bobbisox]

the pain will subside CAJ, it's raw at the minute but like most wounds, it will heal in time xx

[Old_Geezer]

Time. The human mind is resilient but isn't into sudden changes. You'll adjust eventually.

Meanwhile allcoate time for all the stages. Some time to be by yourself to feel sorry for what you are going through. And other time to get your mind on something that you enjoy, and which takes your mind off of it, maybe with friends.