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monkhousebob | 01:52 Mon 27th Oct 2008 | Relationships & Dating
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I am coming upto 30, have had a decent education including university, held a steady job for a good few years, am now currently out of work

Have been told many time that i have decent looks (compared to calum best, niall off hollyoaks??) quite shy , not the most forward or forthcoming with w0men especially

Anyway i know that behaviour breeds behaviour and that the way you act asffects how people act towards ytou

Recently I have tried the internet dating thing but nothing..

Ive heard all the saying like something will happen when u least expect it, but my idea is if you dont make things happen things will stay the same....

so have been on a few dates , with 19 yr olds, 37 yr olds and so many differnet people, all with different takes on life

but still i cannot meet anybody that makes me want to be with them ! someone who knocks me off my feet....ive had this once in my life with hinsight i was young and naive, but am just wondering how its ever going to hapen again, as I never seem to meet new people, and i cant change jobs all the time just bevacuse i want to meet new people!

just wondered if anyone had any ideas for me as im at a loss!

Im a very decent guy, lots of good male friends but little or no female friends1!!! would also like to add some of them haha

my appearance is not an issue, apart from my paranoia that receding means women wont fancy you! i have a good look apart from that but im sure women would forgive that ! and i have a good outlook on life and can have a good time with whoever im with

i just dont get it , surely there are women out there in the same boat? and even when i do meet someone i like , whos to say they will like me is so strange!

by the way is receding an issue for women? i know there are many guys out there who are that women fancy and


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A man losing his hair should not be a problem with women. Being clean and well groomed count for a lot believe me.
Raggy is wrong about thesort of bloke women are looking for. Its these sort of blokes that appear good on the outside, but are bad on the inside that women don't want. And you are already in a relationship with them before you realise what they are really like.
The rest of your attributes sound ok to me, and the right woman would think so too.
What about your job situation. you say you are out of work at the moment. Maybe you should concentrate on this first, and maybe who knows....your true love could be waiting for you in your new job.
Vonda Shephard sang

" i know shes out there somewhere just beyond my reach "

It means, that finding your perfect partner is not to do with how you look, what you wear etc etc............... it is down to meeting that person and that will happen when it is meant to happen and not one second before - regardless of what action you take.

So, if you go out or stay in, or change jobs or whatever, if it is not the time to meet her it wont make didlysquat difference.

SO, i suppose what im saying is, you need to live your life as you want to - enjoy what you do because its enjoyable and its really what you want to do..............take the job that suits you, go on the holidays that interest you and never do anything just to meet someone.

It has no point because you will meet the women/woman to whom you will committ wherever destiny decides, which could be when your out one evening, or could be in the shop you use every day !! we just dont know.............

dont let you search rule your life, let your life be fufilled in itself and know with absolute certainty that you will meet her, perhaps tomorrow, perhaps next week or next year...... but you WILL meet her. !!!

receding hair isnt an issue for the sort of woman that you would want to be with !!! if it was, she wouldnt be the one !!!

I'm in a similar situation to you but the opposite being a female!
I am spending some time working on myself before I enter another relationship as the last few have been disasters.
I am looking for someone really decent this time as all the others just took the **** out of me.
I have a good job my own home and a nice car and I think I attract men who want to take advantage of this but not any more.
My last bfriend was 28 and I am 37 so I think I am going to go for someone older.
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a lovely lady will definitely come along in the end
Hi Raggy x

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