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Matters of the heart

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akeentruth | 20:56 Sun 11th Dec 2005 | Body & Soul
3 Answers
So, I am a lesbian and I work and live with the girl I am in love with, is it possible for us to still be friends? She sometimes will do little things to flirt with me, but dates person after person and I sit back and are still here for her and will do anythings for her and she knows it. Do you think we can have a good friendship?


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Sounds like she's having her cake and eating it, I'm a married man, and I know, that if I was to do that, my wife wouldn't take it at all, nor the other way around, its the same for you, I have nothing against same sex partnerships, if you love each other, but this seems one way, your obviously not happy with it, or you wouldn't have posted it. I think you have to say something. Good luck.
I could be wrong I think there is some resentment which comes across in your post. It may only be a glimmer but if it grows then I would say that things might get more difficult between you. If you are prepared to accept her behaviour then I think you could be friends, but if it is hurting or upsetting you then I think one day you will reach a point where you do not find it acceptable.

When you say you live with her, do you have a sexual relationship with her or are you flatmates? Is she a lesbian, and again 'person after person' is this other women or men.

If, as I read it, you are in love with her, but it's not reciprocated, then the best thing you can do is find somewhere else to live and find someone who feels the same way about you, otherwise you're just setting yourself up for heartache. You can be friends, but I think you'd be better friends if there was a bit of space between you. Otherwise, you're going to read things into your friendship and it's going to leave you bitter, confused and sad.

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