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how to deal with a friend who has started cross dressing

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bednobs | 22:06 Mon 03rd Jan 2011 | Body & Soul
97 Answers
Hi, i need some sensible answers please (!)
i have always considered myself a fairly laid back person. A few weeks ago one of my friends and his girlfriend came to stay for a couple of nights. When they arrived, friend didn't take his coat off for ages. he went to the loo and g/f said to us he was nervous of taking his coat off because he didn't know how we would react to his attire.
When he did take his coat off, he had on crushed velvet leggings, and a longish shimmery top.
Neither of us said anything (why would you, he is our friend and we like him)
over the course of the time he stayed, things progressed and when he left he was wearing womens jewellery, make up as well as womens clothes.
I was surprised because it actually made me feel quite uncomfortable. He has a job that he goes to (i presume wearing mens clothes), and also has a beard. I just don't really know what to do - i didn't tell him i was uncomfortable, but if he comes again i would really prefer he wears mens clothes. Is this an acceptable thing for me to ask him do you think? or do i have to accept him for what makes him feel comfy despite the fact it makes me VERY uncomfy? or is it the end of the friendship because i can't make myself feel comfy with this? If he was worried what we would think, why didn't he just wear a tshirt?
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he cross dresses and has a beard, well so long as he does it in the 'best possible taste' I wouldn't worry.
the lodger..LOL...and crosses his legs!
Do you question women wearing mens clothes i wonder ?
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no i don't, which is why i was so surprised i felt uncomfortable with this.
Surely the issue is not to do with accepting what he chooses to wear but more that a friend who was close enough to be best man at your wedding would spring this on you without notice and in front of someone else making it difficult to discuss with him at the time. If you knew this about him from the start you probably wouldn't have minded at all, I wouldn't.
Some womens' clothes are specifically designed to look like mens' clothes.

Well, okay ... just "boyfriend jackets".
Theres a bloke who dresses up and ive seen him in our local shops and he is well over 6ft. but the strange thing is we just dont notice him anymore but he stares at us which upsets some people.
I dont think it matters these days as the younger male population seems to be feminine by the way they act
Really Philkool? None of the young males I know are any more feminine than other generations before them. However, they are less afraid at tackling things that would have been thought 'women's work' then their fathers, more happy to wear all sorts of fashions, and are also more considerate of women than other generations before them. I can't see that they are more feminine in any way!!
More considerate of women Lottie? Really?

That's obviously not reached my neck of the woods with the local Chavs, mind you, the women have no respect for themselves either.
Perhaps I only come into contact with the nice ones BOO! To be honest, I don't witness much loutish behaviour out here in North Norfolk!!

However, regarding your remark about women, I would say that a lot of women are becoming more masculine with their aggressive manner and loutish drunken behaviour, so if men don't respect them they have only themselves to blame!!
A lot of young men these days wax or pluck their eyebrows and some even wear mascara, but they are still very macho!
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S10 will do Karen ;)
pmsl.
why are people viewing this as all about bednobs?
as though he ''sprung'' something on her, 'threw it at her', as though he did it as a challenge', to shock her to get a reaction, or almost an 'attack'

he just wore whatever he felt like...its not 'about' bednobs...he just decided to allow her to see him in those clothes...thats all...obviously he thought she was such a good mate she should finally know...i very much doubt he was doing it just to get a reaction...
If a male friend had visited me wearing 'crushed velvet leggings and a longish shimmery top', he would have been immediately shown the door and told to only return when he was dressed normally.
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