help, one liners needed

[saintpeter48]

i'm doing a 'this is your life' spoof on a friend and need some one liners please, things like, i wouldn't say that it was a rough estate but ..... or i wouldn't say that she was fat but ....... good old one liners.. thanks in advance

[redman41]

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

[redman41]

The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette

[Booty40]

I wouldnt say your fat but you have more pounds than the bank of england.

[Djay]

Gorgeous, intelligent, kind, sweet, charming, witty, hilarious, friendly...well enough about ME! <then go on to say someting about your friend>

[centrino]

i wouldnt say it was a rough estate but they had a bomb blast last week and it made £30000 worth of improvements.