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Feeling down.....

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floss85 | 13:06 Thu 01st Sep 2005 | Body & Soul
19 Answers

Out of all my mates I seem to be the one that everyone turns to and the one thats always up for a laugh. But just recently I've been feeling really down and its really not like me! Its a combination of different things. Two main thing my boyfriend - who everyone thinks is brilliant, but things are always different behind closed doors! Also my job. I have a new career that I am due to start at the end of Nov, but I cant take it here any more! I genuinly want to cry when I think about having to go to work. My new career is my dream job. I just feel like Im stuck in a rut at the moment! Anyone fancy cheering me up or giving advice??!

Floss x

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Once, at a party in Germany (where I used to live), I was explaining in German the phrase "to take everything in like a dried sponge", if someone is very gullible. The folk I was speaking to didn't seem to understand, so I expanded with "You know, a sponge is all dry until you put it in water, and then it sucks all the water in." (shocked looks from the Germans, particularly the men). "You know, you wash yourself in the shower with a sponge." (more shocked looks, along with exasperation from me that these morons couldn't follow what I meant).

It was only later that I realised that instead of saying "sponge" I was saying "penis".

Oh well, you can't win them all.....

I can't offer advice, but I hope this cheered you up.

Question Author

Thanks sooz! Didnt realise where you were going at first! Got to the bottom and actually lol!! People in the office are looking at me a bit strange!! :)

Thanks x

you could start by handing bf on to one of his many admirers - no need to keep him if he's making you miserable, that is not what bfs are for! And if you've really had it up to here with the job, could you just take a long break till the next one starts? Might mean living off savings, but again, for a fixed period, that might also be better than being unhappy.

Or could you even enquire about starting the new job early? Never know what's possible until you ask.

Question Author

Moved house last month so have no savings at all! :(

I would love to walk out this very second but bill have to be paid!

No chance of starting new job earlier as it a start date for everyone.

My mates are great but I dont think they are used to me being low!

Think Im going to have a fag! That will cheer me up for at least 3 mins!! :)

x

new house and new job - well, those are big changes, can't blame you for feeling unsettled. (New bf would complete the set.) Grit your teeth and wait - it'll arrive sooner than Christmas! Good lluck with it.
Question Author

Very good point JNO!!!

Thanks for listening to me rant on!! :)

x

I agree with other postings. Hang in there.  Give yourself things to do, set some goals for yourself, nightclass? or go walking every second evening?  Learn to knit? (ok, maybe you know that already!) Something where you can meet new people.  When you leave work in the evenings,try to visualise leaving all that is associated with it behind you until the next day.  Set short term goals - for the week, the month etc.  Make sure you have a laugh a day - seek out those friends who will cheer you up, not pull you down.  Treat yourself every so often - a nice massage, a decent book (or an indecent one!!) a good bottle of wine.  Do something every week that you heve never done before, or go somewhere new, anything to get out of the rut.  Be Brave!! And keep on keeping on.
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Thanks Susan!

I know that when November comes, my whole life will change, and when I think about it I get so excited (meaning sometimes I dont get on with my work - ahh well!!!)

I'll just hold out till Nov!!

Thanks for your post!

x

Hi floss,
how you feeling now.?Isn't this place great for cheering us up when needed...But while your still stuck at this job why not use the time to 'dream' of all the 'nice' things your going to say before you leave...
As for your friends not being use to you being low,mine were the same till i reminded them that i was human aswell, after they realised i wasn't invincible after all, It made friendships stronger..As they say "its good to talk"
hi jno I hoping when I submit, This'll be on the top line...

Sorry meant to say, Your bf sounds like my ex, I use to call him
'house devil, street angel'
Question Author

Feeling a bit better now thanks JoAnnMul!

Went home for lunch to sit it the sun! Not long enough to get a tan - but better than sitting in the smoking room!!! :)

x

Question Author
LOL JoAnnMul........sounds very apt, might start using that myself!!! :)

Just think- in November your life will be great. I agree with the others: if boyf isn't making you happy, end the relationship. If things can be fixed, then sit him down and have a good talk. I often go through low patches, and I have to remind myself that they're just that- patches. Honestly, in a couple of weeks you'll look back and wonder what you made such a fuss about!

Chin up, and we're here (virtually, anyway!) if you need us

x

Question Author

I know in a few weeks/months everything will be totally different and I'll be on here telling everyone how grest life is!

Its strange how complete strangers can cheer you up!

Thanks guys!

x

Hi, nice looking post JoAnn! You're right about talking to friends and reminding them that you can't always be the life of the party and they might like to share the responsibility occasionally - a reputation as Miss Good-Natured can be a bit of a burden sometimes.
Hear Hear jno, (or is it here here) My friends said I used to make them feel inadequate because nothing ever 'got Jo down'...Little did they know..
Hi Floss x,after reading your problem I must say that I do have nearenough the same problem,when my ladyfriend died of cancer this valentines day I was devastated,infact I wanted to end my life,after a while my sister said to me Adrian why dont you occupy your mind,so with that I went back to model making,then musicly minded I went back to my old hobby,whch was model making,then I tried drums,anything to take your mind off what is troubling your mind,spend time with your boyfriend go out it will help kindest regards Adrian

i've been feeling down lately too (i'm blaming the ever changing weather!) but reading this and everyone's answers has cheered me up and given some great advice (thanks susan123 especially).  Hope it's done the trick for you, floss85

Like D:REAM once sang 'things can only get better' :-)

Question Author

Heinkle,

Im so sorry to hear about your loss. It puts things in prospective when Im moaning about my job (that Im leaving anyway!) and you're having to cope with a far worse thing!

Eash - I'll blame it on the weather too! Its sunny today so that should keep me smiling!

Thanks both for your advise! :)

x

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