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How Do I Convince Her I Can't/Don't Cook???

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paraffin | 19:17 Tue 03rd Mar 2009 | Food & Drink
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I married a gal who happens to be a trained chef/cook, although that isn't her line of work nowadays. We've been married a long time but I'm still as skilful at cooking as I would be at brain surgery!
No matter, my beloved other half is very non-
plussed because she has to do anything more complicated than beans on toast!
Am I being unjustifiably villified???

P.S. Beans on toast gets boring six times a week!!!
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Why not cook together? Its can turn out quite fun and you can learn a few things and she's not cooking on her own. Compromise!
Cookery is a synch,especially with the internet to help you,what you need to do is start experimenting behind her back till your cooking gets better and you grow more confident,maybe even cooking for a friend to gauge your skills and then one day cook a suprise meal of something she likes and BAM! she'll be so impressed she'll never let you leave the bedroom again,if you know what i mean! lol! seriously though,its very rewarding to start something from scratch and to to be left with a masterpiece at the end of it,fear the kitchen not my friend!
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Easier said than done, dear W.T.!!!! Having to put up with the barbed comments is one thing, but even attempting to invade her hallowed territory only meets with further accusations of "wheedling" and "favour seeking"!!!!
Petit moi!!! Rien!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Learn!

It's not difficult - don't be put off by the fact she's trained after a day at the pans she'll be grateful for anything she doesn't have to cook.

When I was at University I joined a diving club and we all had to take turns at cooking - If you "Couldn't" someone would show you - no excuses!

Many people (inc me) started with spag bol.

Get a "Delia" book she's spent 40 years catering for no hopers in the kitchen
In my experience most men have one 'signature dish' (apparently translates as 'need to impress lady I'm seeing with my culinary skills') so it's really not too difficult to think of at least one thing that's quick, easy, you can do well and that your Mrs will be impressed with. Personally, my own dish of choice is red thai curry and that's got to be one of the easiest things to make ever.

Otherwise the basics to learn are chilli, spag bol, enchillatas, stif frys and a roast (it really is a timing thing initially). Once you've got those mastered you'll pretty much be good to go for trying new recipies and you might even find you enjoy doing it.
Or just do the age old trick of ordering a unblatant takeaway,throwing all the wrappers,containers(evidence) in next doors trash can,because yours will be searched,tell her she's not allowed in the kitchen as your plying her with glass after glass of booze,then you fry onions peppers,clank aroundin the kitchen spill watergravy on the floor fand on your apron for added authenticity and tell her your doing the washing up as you go along as you want this night to be perfect,then come out of the kitchen with the "cooked by you" meal and a rose on the tray! BOSH! your in her good books for life!

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