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Am I wrong

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Velvetee | 13:49 Thu 08th Jan 2009 | Family & Relationships
28 Answers
All morning my 48 year old sister has been sending me abusive text messages.

Before Christmas, I found she had withdrawn �640 from my 83 year old mother's bank account, my mum was not aware of this. Then on Monday, she withdrew �250 and gave �140 to my mother, retaining the rest for herself.

Yesterday, she again visited my mother and demanded her bank book. She became very irate, because I have taken it and it's now in my safe at home. She is accusing me of being a money grabber and saying I am only pregnant because I want my mother's money.

I am worried for my mother, she has carers three times per day and has to pay for this service, we have not been able to pay for this recently, because my sister has cleaned out the account.

I don't understand how anyone could treat a vulnerable, elderly person like this. Apparently, my sister told my mum her husband had said, when my mum dies, my sister won't get a penny. It seems they are trying to reap in as much cash as they can beforehand.

Am I wrong to think this kind of behaviour is despicable, as she doesn't seem to think what she is doing is wrong?
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Go to the Police, this is behaviour is illegal, financial abuse. It needs to be stopped and in my experience the sooner the better. From a previous post I remember you expressing concern about your mother's grandson

Contact your mother's Social Services Department and report it as Elder Abuse. They should investigate and should advies you of what action you can do to safeguard your mother's interests and welfare.

Good luck with it and let us know how things go.
As above �640 theft report to police.
Velvetee. You don't need all this harrassment and upset, especially when you are pregnant. I do hope you take the good advice which previous posters have given you. Theft is theft and is a chargeable offence. I would also, along with everyone, else advise you to go to the police and let them deal with it. The important thing is to take good care of yourself, and try to avoid confrontation with your sister as much as possible.
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Well Brenda, my mother's pension is paid into the bank, but she has a passbook account, which Direct Debits cannot be taken from. She's never had a cheque book before or cashpoint card. This means I have to pay the carers bills in cash at the Bank.

She does have a will, but only has around �16K savings, which isn't alot. She has left �1000 for my sister and her eldest son. I have control of the money and have invested it, but always intended to give my sister half of it. If she had access to it, she would pilfer every penny.

The thing that riles me, is she cannot understand that what she's done is wrong. All day this moron has been sending me abusive texts, she even texted saying that I work as a stripper in a strip club. I honestly think she has a screw or two loose, as well as being a thief and having no morals.

I did consider contacting the police, but my mother asked me not to, so I have to respect her wishes.
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P.S Many thanks to everyone who gave their input to my post.
as everyone else has said report the theft to the police, she has no right to take that money. make sure she doesn't steal anything else as well and also I wish you the best of luck in dealing with this difficult situation
I would also look into power of aterny (rubish spelling I know) or lasting power of aterny.

Get you mother a new account and transfer all the remaining money and bills etc over to it then close the old one. As long as your mother is aware of what you are doing for her it should be ok.

If you can, get independant verification of her state of mind and that she knows what you are doing. You don't want your sister saying you have put undue pressure on her etc.

Move evrey thing out of your sisters reach. If she is a signatory she can EASILY get a new pass book and clean everything out again.
Hello velvetee. It is so sad when this kind of thing happens. However, I think you have to override your mother's wish not to go to the police. You are soon going to bring a new life into this world. Whst is going to happen during your confinement? You will not be able to protect your mother during that time, and indeed for some time afterwards! You really must go to the police now. i wish you luckXX

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