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gerkin | 15:14 Mon 14th Feb 2005 | Food & Drink
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How would one spitroast an elephant ?
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A bit at a time!
On a very large rotisserie

Try using one of the new Zimbabwe bred Bonsai elephants, these are more manageable.

Waitrose stocks them - larger branches only.

There's also the boned and rolled elephant breast -it's bootiful!
I believe you can get jumbo hotdogs in Tesco.

I get the impression that you are refering to the sexual term for 'spitroasting' i.e. gang-banging. And an elephant is a woman who wears size 12+

 

How rude

A man at each end, both on stilts.

To avoid the risk of food poisoning, please ensure your elephant is thoroughly defrosted first.

Raw meat should be kept on the lowest part of the fridge to avoid drips contaminating other food. So keep your defrosting elephant on the lowest shelf, below the butter with the footprint in it.

I believe I saw the George Forman Giant Spitroast in the new Argos catalogue

sunflower68 - you did indeed. Click here for the correct Argos page.

 

Indie  if I type that up on ebay what are my chances of coming up with something??  cheaper too.

Take a look here for yourself...

Indie you're hilarious. Sick but hilarious.
First one must light a F*^"*!ng big fire !!!!
First stuff a mouse into a rat, then stuff the rat into a rabbit, the rabbit into a pigmy goat, the goat into a sheep, the sheep into a gazelle, the gazelle into a zebra, the zebra into a gnu and the gnu in the elephant. All must be boned , but your local butcher will be only too pleased to do it for you. Remember not to use too highly seasoned gravy for baisting or it will mask the delicate flavour of the dish.
Indie I think I love you.  Index???

Especially for sunflower69.

 

My mistake. Especially for sunflower68.

 

Awww; don't think I've ever giggled so much looking at a flipping catalogue.....you do know how to flatter a girl!

However I never can resist a bargain and have gone ahead and ordered one....silly me.

Bet that was speedy delivery. "I'll just click on 'order' and... OOH! Here I am!"

I'd like to order one.

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