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Sisters and babies

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boona | 23:36 Sun 03rd Aug 2008 | Pregnancy
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Hi all, I wondered if I could have some opinions on the following: I told my younger sister that myself and partner were trying for a baby. (I told her that I may have problems in that area because I tried with a previous fiancee for 2years and didnt get pregnant) I told her if I was to have a boy then I would call him Lewis. My sister was well aware of how much I wanted a child. About a month later my sister said she was going to try for a baby also. Not long after she fell pregnant, I was a bit gutted co's I was not getting pregnant and she got pregnant straight away. When her baby was born she used the name Lewis as his middle name. (co's she said she liked it also) Two years later I am still not pregnant and even though I get on with my sister, I still feel upset inside that she used the name Lewis for her child. Should I feel like this or am I just being selfish?
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not like she used it as a first name is it. I dont think anyone else will think its wrong either. Do you think maybe you are taking your own troubles out on her??
you dont know that she may have always liked the name too. Just because you like a name doesnt mean you get first refusal. What if you have children and they are all girls?

Its not selfish, but come on, theres worse things that can happen in life than someone choose the name you like.
Actually I can kind of understand where you are coming from. It would really annoy me that after you had already told her you liked the name and she still went ahead and used it, I'd be slightly peeved too. I think it would be different had she approached you and asked how you would feel as she really liked the name too, in that case I would be flattered, but there are a million different names out there, if my sister told me that she liked a particular name for her first baby then I would let her use it and not "steal" it. In fact, I'd feel pretty daft not being able to think of an original name myself but having to copy someone elses.

From an outsiders perpesctive I would say to take it as a compliment and be flattered that she your sister thinks that highly of you.

How about spelling Lewis differently if you have a little boy?
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Feeling upset that your sister used the name you liked, probably has more to do with you not being able to conceive, rather than the name itself, it just makes you more aware of your situation.

Have you sought any treatment? There may be physical reasons why you are unable to fall pregnant.
I don't think it should be a problem.

Like someone else said it's not like she used it as a first name.

It just shows great minds think alike and you obviously have good taste - try and think of it like that.

I'm sure its just a case of you feeling oversensitive.

Good luck with trying for a baby. Hope it works out for you xxx
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Thanks for all your replies, I think I am being a bit sensitive about it!! It is more to do with the fact that I was trying to get pregnant and then not only did she try and then get pregnant successfully she copied my name. I kind of feel like it was a bit mean of her, you know like she wasn't being very thoughtful.

I have just started a 3mth course of Clomid, maybe that will help me.
hi boona i think you are being a big over sensitive but i can totally understand where you are coming from. my sil is a pain in the back side she copied everything i want or do. i decide my boys need new shoes, so do her girls, i want to paint my living room so does she. i also wanted to call my second child kaylee if it was a girl, and she knew this and chose kaylee for her daughter. luckily mine was a boy but i was really anoyed too.
when i get wound up my partner says, sje obviously has no imagination of her own if she has to copy other people, and he is right.
try not to let it bother you, although easier said than done.
good luck with everything x
do you know, I cant even remember what my sister would like for her names and shes told me loads and loads of times.

Perhaps she really didnt know that it was a name chosen by you, after all what mum is going to call a baby by a name just because itll upset another woman. A name is a difficult choice for any parent.
Yer if redcrx did take mine there are plenty of others out there. Hope you get result you are after soon. xx

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