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what shoulk i do?

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ILOVEMOLLIEX | 21:16 Sat 27th May 2006 | Parenting
6 Answers

My daughter has just turned 12 last month although she looks about 16. she is a well developed and very good looking girl, who is always getting attention from older males. someone age 24 on her email has alledgedly been stalking her. she has been envolved in lying about her age and taking her 23 year old sisters id to also make friends. however after smelling a rat as we mums do, i started asking some questions, i just knew things had changed with her. i opened a can of worms and seen that she was putting herself at risk. when confronted with some alarming things she turned histerical, and threatned to kill herself if i talked to the police or her school pastorial teacher. she is being stalked by the 24 year man by phone, email, and other worrying text msgs at 5 am from i dont know who as it is made from a BT payphone. he seems to have already met up with her and refferrs to her by her name + his sweet babychild.


I have been forced to sweep it all under the carpet by 2 of my family because she gets in such a state when i try to even tell her that she is not in trouble but questions do not tally with wat she says.


she is also being bullied at school and is a top pupil. it is all not her caracter at all.


i have let it go because im not supported and feel bitter and angry at them. i am alone and feel my child and others are at risk.


are they rite? that i will make things worse for her.


at the moment i dont have a voice.


thanks for listning.

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Woah! if your instincts are telling you to call the police -do it hun! To be honest, if this guy is calling your daughter and you believe that he has already met her - its past the "I wonder" stage. You need to think that if you DONT tell the Police, what could happen next ...?


With re; to bullying, you must have a chat with her teachers - this may be why shes turned to this guy.


IloveMollie, please dont be silent. Why dont you go and have a chat with the police while shes at school. take all evidence you have with you. tell them thats shes likely to kick off and that things may not be rosy. do that with the teachers as well speak to them on the phone while shes at school and tell them that you dont want her knowing youve spoken to them.


What reasosn does your family have for you keeping quiet? is it only because your daughter is likely to kick off? Wouldnt you all prefer her to kick off and be safe?


good luck hun and let us know how you get on xxx

Have you tried to put a block on her email account? you could add some parental controls so that she is not able to have conversations like that. Have you also tried emailing this guy and tellinghim to keep away - i know i would and after youve done that block his address.


im affraid i would be inclined to get his number deleated off her fone as well. sounds underhanded but she is only 12 yrs old.

Got to agree with Flowerpetal you want her to be safe,she's only 12,one day she WILL understand and appreciate you done it bacause you love her!!What does her older sister say??
start ignoring the family - your child has been targeted by a sex offender (sexual offences against the person act made it a criminal offence to "groom" a child under the age of 13 for a sexual relationship - an offence the police will take very seriously) nothing else matters now, take her to counciling if she is threatening suicide and you really believe her (it sounds more like a good trigger of control for a kiddy to me) but she obviously is crying out for help and it is these strange guys that have answered.
no mobile phone, no internet etc unless supervised and call the police to discuss the situation

good luck
Please seek help from the police. This is a serious matter and your family members are being very foolish to let this continue. I had problems with my older male neighbour when I was a child and it took a lot of painful courage to tell me parents at such a young age. They supported me, even when I lashed out and threatened to run away. I was scared as I knew it wasn't right! She may be developed well, but shes only a baby at 12 years old. Let her kick off and get it out of her system, I honestly believe she will thank you at the end of it. Don't let another parasite in our world get away with something as wrong as child molestation. Good luck, my thoughts are with you x
OK
male point of view
talk to the man if you can - If he doesn't run a mile when he's told she's 12 - CALL THE POLICE
My mate's girlfriend's daughter is only 13, but when I first met her, I thought she was 18/19 etc etc until I found out!!
If you can get his number from her phone/his e-mail address, contact him yourself. It may cause an argument between you and your daughter, but that is a lot better than what could happen

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