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Can't Locate My ex Husband For Mainenance Payments

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Fuzzy Peach | 15:17 Mon 04th Jun 2007 | Parenting
14 Answers
I am having terrible trouble trying to locate my ex-husband who is in arrears with child support payment to the pricely sum of �17000. The CSA can't find him, the Inland Revenue can't locate him even though he's supposedly self emplyed. I have tried the electoral role - he doesn't register. He's not in the phone book. I do have his parents address but it seems they don't want their grandchild to receive what she is due as they are un-cooperative. The only other person who knows his address is the social worker who cannot give me any information due to the data protection act. Any ideas...it seems I hit a brick wall every time I attempt to trace the bloke! Any suggestions welcome????
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Surely the social worker would have to give the details to the CSA?? do you not still have any documents of his, maybe something with his NI number on like an old wage slip? i believe this is of great use to the CSA. Is there anything you do know about him or his whereabouts?? do you know what kinda work he does?? do you know roughly where he lives?
Question Author
Thanks for your response....Thew social worker cannot divulge any details to the csa - daft I know as they are both working for the good of the child - but no. I do know what area he is living in and have tried all avenues - I have his tax reference and NI number and the csa have all these details but they cannot locate him - the call me regularly to find out if 'I' have any more information of his whereabouts. I have even consulted a private detective but they have told me it could cost hundreds and hundreds with no guarantee of locating him. They had his previous address but he has since moved on. AAArgh!
He must be doing a cash in hand job then? if he had a proper job or was claiming they would be able to find him of his NI or tax reference, i cant believe the social worker cannot give to the CSA, i understand that she shouldnt give it to you but not to give it to them is crazy. Did he leave a forwarding address when he left his previous? theses are problem things you have already tried and im sorry i cant think of any other ways but this is a tough one! do you know when he visits his parents? could you get someone to follow him back home? also what kind of work is it he does? and does he have a social life, is there any chance of finding him that way? I will keep thinking for you, good luck xx
sorry i meant probably not problem!
Question Author
probably yes he is working for cash....something the inland revenue would be thrilled about I suspect! Although he lives quite a long way from my I will try the 'friend following him home' trick I think....will see if it works anyway....many thanks x
if u need any help i know a few stalkers! LOL Good luck
Question Author
I'll try anything lol......just contacted a solicitor regarding claiming against the CSA for negligance....hmmm we'll see
Im having problems with the CSA myself, it seems when they cant get wht they want out of the father they take it out on the mother, i get constant phone calls from them over things that i cant control. Ive been in tears on the phone to them today they got me that stressed, what they dont realise in my case is that they give me grief then i also get it from him! it doesnt help that im 2 weeks of my due date and very highly strung! breath..........
when did you put in your application for child maintenance, �17000 surely your child must be 10ish years old if not older, if he is selp employed he will need to be registered and have a cis number for any sub contractors he works for to pay him etc, csa need to ask the social worker and they should be able to give it to them i cant see why they wouldnt, maybe csa are being lazy
Hey Fuzzy,

Do not expect to receive a payment, even if they find him it's no guarantee they will get payments from him.

For 11 years the CSA have been telling me my ex owes me �8,000 he started paying so I asked for advance payment. Was told this would take 6-8 weeks, 10 months later and they have just informed me they got the arrears wrong and dropped them by �5,000!!!!

They are a waste of time and space. xxxxx
Question Author
thanks all for your responses...good news though...have stumbled upon a web site for solicitors who have agreed to take my case on - they claim non payments from the csa direct when they have acted negigently - which in my case they have ie..not following up calls, letters, and acting on a face to face twelve months too late....if anyone wants info then let me know - will keep you posted tho to progress...meanwhile the *-''@ of an ex still has paid nothing...
Hi there,

You sound quite determined to find this guy, so play the long game and 'do him over' properly! By this, I mean that you (and some eager friends!) should:

a) Take shifts in watching his parents place and eventually he will turn up.
b} Then follow him home, discreetly.
c} Come back to his house the next day and follow him to work
d) if you are feeling REALLY sadistic trail him to his social haunts

You will then have his car details, address and place of work and maybe girlfriend / regular haunts details. With that info, you could maybe:

A} confront him and make him pay
B) or humiliate him at work / home with a dramatic scene (tears and baby dressed in charity shop rags would be a good touch!)
c) send the boys round and deliver him some overdue 'good news'
d) inform the csa and do their job for them.
e) wait until he takes his new lady on a particularly romantic night out (the 'jackpot' here is the proposal night!) and make a spectacularly emotional scene that leaves him wishing a big hole would open up and leaves him covered in his meal / drink / both and probably single again!

Be warned, if the CSA get him, he will have to be made to pay MORE than you currently receive in benefits before they will pay you a thing! Crucifying him is one thing, not getting paid for your trouble is quite another!

My advice, corner him and do a deal. The CSA are crap and all the hot air about passports confiscated and tags for non-payers will not put a bean in kids dinner plate!

Good luck!
-- answer removed --
Also, this latest 'no win-no fee' gimmick that legal firms are advertising, of suing the CSA, will be very unlikely to suceed. The CSA will always argue that they followed 'laid down Govt legislation' in trying to contact the errant father and I cannot see legal action achieving anything, generally speaking, other than making Lawyers even richer, on the back of Insurance companies that cover them, allowing them to work for you with no fee to you. If they actually got a payout though, even a 'without predjudice' one, their costs come out of it and they could be substantial.

Again though, good luck.

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