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friends and 7yrolds

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hannah40 | 18:01 Mon 27th Jun 2011 | Family Life
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my 7yrold girl is in year 2 and seems to find it difficult to have 1 nice friend she seems to have 1 friend one week and then they go and play with someone else and she is on her own again.Is this normal at 7 ?ive gone through all the girls in her class and suggested inviting them round for tea but she says i dont really play with her or her ,so im at a loss what to do.im a really introvert my self i dont like crowds of people so im not one to chat to the other mums when they are in a group.im thinking perhaps i should go to confidence classes as it may be because of me she doesnt have 1 friend ,all the girls have there own friends and she has to ask them if she can play .i feel so sorry for herany ideas?
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Hi hannah,
are there any activity groups for your daughter in your area? May be she just needs to build some confidence up in interactng with other kids? If she starts with a clean slate so to speak .. with other children she doesn't know, may be it will give her a stepping stone?
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i think there is a youth club she could go to at the church connected to her school.she is in a primary school so the classes of children stay the same all the way through school so as far as i can see it if the girls are in groups now and she is with the same kids right through school how will she make new friends unless i change schools.
Take her to that hannah .. might be just what she needs. A more casual get together than school atmosphere. You shouldn't have to even think about changing schools x
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Thank you Quassia
Girls make up and fall out on a daily basis. You only have her side to the story and obviously feel protective. The other mums will probably be thinking the same as you.
you know hannah, this is very normal for little girls, in fact most girls spend the first 12 years of their lives making and breaking friends, its heartbreaking to watch. if you let a member of staff know they normally help x
my daughters school used to do a circle time with a small group of girls, it used to help them find common ground and help each other in school, this used to encourage friendships and instill confidence.
Hi Hannah, it is pretty normal for this to happen but if you're really concerned, you could have a chat to a member of staff who could possibly have a few strategies to get things moving in the right direction - Such as a buddy system. Do the have a bus stop (not a real one) in the playground? I found out about this last week through swapping ideas with other schools .. the bus stop is there for any child to stand next to if they have no one to play with. Usually, the children will pair up with each other, if not, then a member of staff on duty will find a friend for them.
Do try to get her to that club, it'll work wonders for her confidence and I'm sure it'll help you too once you start getting to know the regulars.
Do you know your daughter really sounds like mine! Even on your other thread too. She has had a 'best friend' since nursery but the do fall out and she will then say she has played with no one all day. I say all the names of the other girls I know and she always says they play with someone else and I have no friends now! I know she is over reacting though and I suspect yours is too. It is awful to think of them sat on their own at playtime isnt it? I dont think they do though.
you could mention it to the teacher, they will probably reassure u that this isnt the case. At my daughters school they have a bench where if a child has noone to play with they sit and then other children invite them to play. my daughter has lots of friends, but does fall in and out with them. Usually when they dont do what she wants (she is quite bossy,bless) lol

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