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drchasuble | 18:30 Thu 05th Oct 2006 | People & Places
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My mum used to send me and my sister off on errands when we were kids but she'd make up a name of a sweet or cleaning product or whatever it was she wanted then send us off to the village shop to get it. We'd go in and say "My mum says can she have a tin of elbow grease" and the shopkeeper would always say "Are you sure that's what mummy wants?" and we'd say that was definitely what mum she'd said then we'd go home to tell her that they didn't have what she wanted and she'd kill herself laughing. Did you parents ever do anything similar? And have a jolly good laugh at your naivety? By the way I had a fantastic childhood. Very happy. Despite the laughing hyena mother part.
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Not mother, but a firm my brother worked for used to send the new boys out for a tin of light black paint and deliver it to an address which they said was about two miles away - the address was where they worked!
tartan paint from B Q.
How about a 'long weight?' ('wait' - explanation for the yanks)

My nephew asked if he could have some water in his cup of milk the other day, so my sister ran the tap - and my nephew was quite satisfied that it tasted better with the water in it - funnily enough, altho' he 'watched' her put the water in, she simply held the cup in front of the tap so that from his angle of viewing, it looked like the water went in.
Similarly, when my daughter was 3, she asked for a slice of cheese i was slicing. I gladly obliged and handed her a slice. She took a bite and decided that she didnt like that white cheese, which was LARD!!!!!!
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Maybe the childhood wasn't so idyllic come to think of it... My dad bought me and my sister these little bear shaped soaps from Liberty one time mine was dark brown and my sister's was cream coloured, he told us it was chocolate and I ate the bears ear. Bubbly.

My uncle pretended to break off a piece of chocolate from his bar, and gave me an OXO cube instead... :'o(
My daughter whinges at her Dad because he can't put her tights on as well has her mum "who has been on a course on how to put tights on"
We were at the school prize evening the other night , where the 14 & 15 yearold had been nominated but didn't want to go cos it was 7 til 9 valuable tele and MSN time! They wanted to totally minimise the situation. BIG MISTAKE and chance for a wind up! Because there wasn't time to have a meal after work and before the event we decided to eat at the 2 for 1 nearby beefeater. But true to form we had them believe that we were putting special measures in place for the prize evening, having a meal out in honour of the nominees, chatted about the camcorder we had (hadn't) borrowed, and waving to their trumpet player uncle who wasn't outside the venue when we got there. Great.
On holiday our dad would let us put EXTRA sugar on our Frosties.
But he'd swap the sugar for Salt. Ha Ha.
Apparently my Dad once pretended, whilst trying to lift me out my cot, that I was too heavy and that he couldn't lift me up anymore. I got quite upset apparently...(who wouldn't at the thought of having to stay in their cot for the rest of their life!)

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