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the mystery of men!

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Headless Rat | 10:54 Wed 28th Jun 2006 | Body & Soul
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Yesterday I posted a question "to text or not to text"! well I did text him but got no reply so looks like thats a dead duck!! Anyway, what I was wondering is, why don't lads just send a text saying "Hey, not really interested. Sorry" or something to that effect ?If they have the guts to keep asking you to meet up and saying how they enjoyed themselves the last few times we met, then WHY don't they have the guts to let you know they're not interested?? Its rotten them just not replying! SO embarassing. Also, I thought the date went really well; we laughed a lot, had a lot in common etc etc and it's definitely not that I scared him away by being too eager because I am not that way inclined.....If you don't know what went wrong on the date, then how are you meant to know what not to do in future??? Men certainly are a mystery & SO much more complicated than women!!
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We will never understand them! I met a guy out a couple of times and he seemed so genuine and lovely and as he had a long-term girlfriend it was only ever meant to be a mates thing, we swapped numbers and even he didn't have the courtesy to text back!! What hope have we got with potential boyfriends if even boy-mates don't text........
years ago i went out on a couple of dates with a bloke and then he didn't return my call.It was well before the days of mobiles, so i wrote him a letter, saying, like you, that i thought it was so unkind to just not reply to my calls, and if he wasn't interested to have the guts to let me know.
I got a nice letter back saying that he really liked me but just didn't want a relationship at that time, blah blah blah. Did i appreciate his honesty? To be honest, it really p1ssed me off! lol x
From a Mans perpective, most men can't face the music, its easier to ignore rather than discuss problems especially with the opposite sex.
My brother always vets his calls if he gives his number to a woman, i can't make out why he won't respond to someones call/txt message, its very shallow of him, i think its the rejection thing/commitment thing in the back of mens Brains

SORRY GIRLS, where not all like it by the way
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Crsigal, sorry to hear it but your last line did make me laugh!
Laurence2, im actually beginning to think that ALL men really ARE like that!well the ones I meet anyway
And it's weird because I'm afraid of commitment myself so i NEVER give off the vibes of wanting a relationship. I think I just seem like I want the craic, ye know?
Also, I had a really unconventional relationship with a guy for a whole year-we weren't bf/gf so we could still be with others. i never minded when he was with anyone else but he used to go mad when i was so im so bloody confused!!!
I actually just do not know WHAT way to be!!
If you only text him yesterday then he might just not have replied yet. When I'm busy a reasonably low priority is a chatty text from someone i know so it sometimes takes me a cou[ple of days to get round to answering them, or his phone might be dead, lots of reasons why he might not even be ignoring you.
Have you never done it to a bloke? I have. Whether it be a moment of weakness where I've given my number out then regretted it, or gone on a date only to find that they are immensely dull or annoying. I've resorted to ignoring their calls or texts for various reasons; some valid, some not.

The thing is, Ratfink, us wimin expect men to do most of the legwork when it comes to chatting up/dating etc. Think how many times a man may be rejected or even humiliated by girls he tries to chat up. Or think about how many men you have rejected in being chatted up. They have a rough ride too.
Headless Rat, i just got back from one of them Butlins weekends {Adults only} and we had the graic, the amount of whats your mobile number conversations was just unbelieveable, it seems the Done thing these days, the problem is that their will always be someone man or woman who will get hurt
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Hi Champagne, i agree totally with on on the fact that they have a rough time too...i'd be a crap guy if i was one!!I do think it is very hard on them
The thing is though that i have never done that to a lad...I'd always just bite the bullet and say "eh, sorry, I'm just not interested" or "I'm not ready for a relationship yet" etc etc but I think the worst thing to do is just not reply.
I guess I'll never know what went wrong though!I'm not likely to bump into him and if I did I'd prob run a mile!
He did get the message though, Noxlumos, because it did deliver.
Anyway, I'm not some possessed stalker who can think of nothing else and won't let it go...I'm kind of just remarking on it more than anything else!
Headless - the delivery notes on your phone just mean it's sent, not that he's recieved it (bit useless i know). My phone had no signal for 2 days last week for some reason, so I recieved texts late.
Although, if he's not interested, he'll probably just ignore you rather than text back. I've hidden my phone in the fridge before so I couldn't hear it ringing after my flatmate gave someone my phone number.
Question Author
Uglybob!!thats terrible putting your phone in the fridge!haha! Why do u call yourself ugly bob, by the way?thats not a very nice name to give yourself...
Men and women are the same a lot of the time. I've said it before and I'll say it again. I've been stood up before, had girls never text back, and I've dumped via text before. Sometimes we're all not as nice and kind as we aspire to be! Just a human thing rather than a gender issue
Last post should also have read
- "Sorry to hear thatHeadless Rat. Hope the next bloke is better for you". How crass of me. ;)

At least you tried. And he may yet reply.
-- answer removed --
Headless Rat It's just a name I've used on the net for years
annoying isnt it. i have the same problem right now with a bloke that supposudly really likes me and we meet up loads. he texts and rings me loads and i always respond but then comes to me giving him a friendly message to see how he is doing and i hear nothin even though some of the time he asks me to 'give him a text later'. then the next day everything is back to normal and his back in touch. i just dont get the logic behind it. x

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