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What Changes Do I Need To Make In My Life?

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abbeylee90 | 22:11 Thu 09th Nov 2023 | How it Works
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So socail life wise I'm happy just not getting luck dating wise so do I need to go down dogs home less and stop going out with that man down there I do like hanging out with him but think that would change if I got with someone so do I need to go down dogs home less? I just think it's time I settled got a date and move out sorry to say but I don't want to end up like that man down dogs homecas bad as it sounds 

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Are you going to the dog kennels for a social life or for the dogs. Will your not going mean the dogs do not get walked as much. They need a social life too.Before you move out you need to have a steady income to be able to afford decent housing. Why not see how your new job works out before you make any major changes
22:19 Thu 09th Nov 2023

Abbey/  Getting a man is beginning to sound like your quest for a suitable job!  I thought you had "dropped" the older man at the kennels?  I'd say get a life - with or without a man.

Are you going to the dog kennels for a social life or for the dogs. Will your not going mean the dogs do not get walked as much. They need a social life too.

Before you move out you need to have a steady income to be able to afford decent housing. Why not see how your new job works out before you make any major changes

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Not dropped as such but I need a man of my own but I have to when If I did get with someone.

I go down there for the dogs for me and them to get out not bothered about everyone else really.

Exactly would need full time hours to live on my own 

Concentrate on getting full time steady work.  You seem to move on quicky if there is any part of a job you dont like.

Lots of people dont particularly like their jobs but they realise thats just life, they do it for the money they need to pay rent/bills/mortgage.

You are in a great opportunity to save money for your future, you will never have as much spare cash as you do now, living with your parents.

I assume your parents also do the majority of housework, gardening and maintenance, if that's the case you will never have as much free time.

In your shoes I would be working as many hours as possible to save for a deposit for my own home. When I was in that situation many years ago I had a full time job but also worked evenings. 

There is no prince on a horse going to whisk you away.  You have to rely on yourself to get where you want. 

If you do meet somebody special along the way, that's a lovely bonus, but don't pause life waiting.

It's your life, so live it the best you can

 

Abbey, your time at the dogs home is just about the only constant in your life, why would you think of 'going down less'? Jobs, many of them, have come and gone and you've had no success with dating apps. Deciding that it's now time you 'got settled' could add an air of desperation to any future date, relationship. It'd be much better to get other things in your life sorted - stopping all the faffing around with unsuitable jobs would be a good start!

When was the last time you were in a relationship and how had you met him? 

I only ask as you seem to, at times, be nervous of meeting men you have been chatting with on the online dating sites. Are you ensuring that you put a 5 or 10 mile radius on these dating sites so you are more likely to meet a local chap? Maybe you should get chatting online to more than one chap at time so you can compare how chats n texts are going n then  see how you get along with them. 

You now in your 30s so have you thoughts about having children at all in future? You don't mention whether it is something you are open to. Ultimately you need to find a bond with someone that could lead to a relationship, but if you are always having doubts and never actually meet anyone from these dating sites then a relationship never has chance to flourish.

People tend to be in relationship for a couple of years before moving onto commitment or having a family.

Just wondered if you were still in love with a previous guy that you unable to move on from.

Hoping to help or offer advice but not sure what you need to hear 

I don't understand why you like hanging out with him if 

 

//I appreciate he being kind giving me lifts and going for lunch but he does my head in grabbing me to do it all the time as I'm leaving where I know him from I got things I need to do myself feel like he obsessed with me//

Abbey, do you ever follow any of the advice given here? 

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