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How did you get through it?

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steadyjack | 14:53 Tue 09th Dec 2008 | Family Life
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It's my 1st Christmas without my wife this year. I'm a widower. I know it's only 2 weeks holiday with Dec 25th being just 'one more day' but I can't face it. I'm talking to someone about grief and she's helping me, but as each night draws us closer to the 25th I'm sinking into depression. What did others do about their 1st Christmas alone?
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Thanks all of you for sharing, I went to the crematorium gardens on Saturday and spent time where her ashes were scattered. I can't feel her around me so much now. I was told that would happen but I didn't want it to.

Terambulan I have black labradors and without them I'd have gone insane months ago. They don't look for my wife anymore. They don't leave my side since she died.

The anti-depressants are sitting unopened. I know they're there if things get unbearable. At the moment crying helps release something, then I can carry on.
You've made so much progress, Jack. I've left my mobile number for you in Facebook, and if you want to talk, then don't hesitate to call or text me. We're all thinking of you. xxx
Hello jack --- I wished you was my next door neighbour.
I would be there for you any time of the day.
I was a carer for 2 yrs, and its the best thing I ever done !
I loved to be around people when they really needed to talk.
I hope that day by day, it will get a lot easier for you.
Take care, xx Pusskins
steadyjack,
I feel for you with all my heart. When my mum died (20 years on 6th jan) she was only 69. My poor dad the first christmas wanted to put a place for my mum at the dinner table, but I had two young girls and told him it would be so upsetting for them he agreed we wouldnt do it. But one other thing we didnt do was talk about her. Please talk to your son and daughter about your wife, their mum.With all the happy memories you have of her. It will help them and you,although sad.
And from someone who suffers from depression myself I would say antidepressions do not take away the memoires but help you to cope better with them. And short term you will not be dependent on them. As I am sure your doctor told you. So take them if you feel you want to.
I send all my love to you and you will be in my thoughts for the week to come. Take Care. xx

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