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bobtheturkey | 23:57 Tue 27th Feb 2024 | ChatterBank

14 Answers

A neighbour of mine Phyllis McCrackin invited me round to hers earlier for a fish finger sandwich, she then insisted I take a look at a mole on the small of her back believing that because I once cut her dead husbands toenails with a chainsaw 10 years ago (he was alive at the time) that I have some medical knowledge, as she asked me she kept winking in a possibly suggestive manner but she is somewhat cross eyed enabling her to look east and west at the same time so it was difficult to tell her intentions, I was wondering whether this whole epsiode was an attempt to spark romance between us

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Emigrant Or Ex-Pats?

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Buenchico

Tell her that the mole is only hibernating and that it will go back to ts burrow as soon as it's Spring. In the meantime though, if she considers it to be a disfigurement, she could cover it up with an orange bucket from B&Q.

Buenchico

"With her one eye on the pot and the other up the chimney" . . .

sunny-dave

I suspect she mistook you for Phil McCavity, the jobbing handyman - be sure to check for badgers before boarding.

lankeela

Did she ask you to Phyl McCrackin?

Ken4155

Bob, fish don't have fingers, so she was definitely up to something. My guess is she's after some of your B&Q collection.

Lie-in King

Sounds like she had a Birds Eye view.

10ClarionSt

Sounds like the nutters have taken over the asylum. I'm new here, too. I've only been using this site for 19 years. Maybe I'll get to used to it soon.