Men and porn!

[CAJ1]

My boyfriend looks at porn, fact of life most men do it and thats ok with me as long as I don't really see it/know about it! Anyway, I was on his laptop and was a bit shocked at the rudeness of some of the subjects he had typed in to google and how many there were. I talked to him about it and he said would I prefer he looked at porn or went out and tried to cheat on me? I took that as meaning if he wasn't looking at porn he would be out looking for it instead to which he said I had twisted what he was saying. What do you make of it? Did I twist what he said? Would men really do that if there was no porn? And how much is too much??

[joggerjayne]

You never hear your b/f saying things like "wet p*ssy" ?

Not even when he's ... you know ... "down there" ?

So what does he say ?

Or does he maintain a polite silence ????

[betterman]

He must say something like "non arid genitalia" , as not to offend the recipient of his oral adventure.

[joggerjayne]

Don't agree, Raggy

But we need to steer clear of too much details here.

[CAJ1]

Um, you lot have me thinking now! I don't think he says anything while he is actually down there (1. he's a man and can't multi task and 2. He's too busy doing other stuff!) But we have nicknames for each others bits and before you's ask, NO, I AM NOT TELLING YOU WHAT THEY ARE!!!!

[joggerjayne]

Try it, CAJ1

Part of his ...

(getting serious here)

Part of his attraction to porn might be the verbal thing. A lot of guys seem to like to hear a girl saying "fcuk me, fcuk me". It's good for their fragile egos.

So next time he's "down there", how about you try "talking dirty"

Start off not using any rude words. Just say "I love it" or "That's so good"

See how he responds (it will be positive)

They say things like "Yes, lick me just there"

And so on.

Before you know it, you'll be shouting it at each other, and your "wet p*ssy" will be the main subject of both of your cries.

He probably won't need porn any more (except to research great new ways to stimulate your wp).

All this is obviously better if the two of you are alone !

[CAJ1]

lol, joggerjayne, I'll be sure to try it out and see what happens! I think anything like that will be met with a positive reaction from him!

[joggerjayne]

Guesses for those nicknames ...

His ... Norman

Hers ... Wendy

His ... Mr Happy

Hers ... Winkey

His ... the old Peperoni

Hers ... Pinkey

His ... the old bargepole

Hers ... clammy

[Doc.Spock.1]

Hear about the chap who went down on girlfiend in field at night.

He said " I wish I had a torch".

She said, "So do I, you've been chewing grass for half an hour "

[CAJ1]

His is in that list, mine isn't - keep guessing!

[Doc.Spock.1]

Flippin eck JJ, your replies work for me, pass the tissues.

[CAJ1]

lol doc

[Doc.Spock.1]

The best collection of porn I ever saw was under the bed of a woman I did some decorating for.

[joggerjayne]

The other wp fantasy satisfier for guys seems to be telling them to put a pillow under their heads, and then kneeling over their mouths (sorry to be a bit detailed).

Maybe you do that anyway, but guys seem to like it, and it means you can position your bits as you choose (or you can even watch the telly).

And with the benefit of gravity, if he like "wet", then he's going to have a field day.

[Doc.Spock.1]

Slow down JJ, I am typing this as fast as I can.


The mental pic is amazing, I may never walk in a straight line again.


Bet you were brought up in a convent.

[joggerjayne]

Doc, this is girl talk. Go and have a beer or something.

Okay, so I'm going with Mr Happy for him.

Still not got hers. Let's see ...

The little love tunnel?

The beaver

Muffkin

(nothing involving hairy references, I hope)

[CAJ1]

Ah, thats one already tried and tested! I'll be sure to seek you out for further sex advice joggerjayne!

[Doc.Spock.1]

Harold Robbins, eat your heart out.

[carrust]

I once decorated a cellar for a woman...she'd had it converted into a dungeon...lots of black & red paint...