"It's being reported that Moammar Gadhafi is surrounded by an elite core of female bodyguards. In a related story, Wayne Roony and Prince Andrew simultaneously invaded Libya."
"Moammar Gadhafi was said to be hanging out in a series of underground tunnels. That's basically admitting you're evil."
"The strikes on Libya are costing £100 million. Or, in Moammar Gadhafi terms, five Cheryl Cole concerts."
"Moammar Gadhafi is starting to sound a little crazy. Al-Jazeera canceled his show, 'Two and a Half Shiites.'"
"Moammar Gadhafi is blaming Osama bin Laden for all of Libya's troubles. It's going to be awkward when these two guys meet in hell."