Lodger

[gingerflaps]

Hi

My best friend has recently left her husband and is lodging at mine, this is the 1st time me and my husband have had a lodger as we are very private people and like to keep ourselves to ourselves. My hubby wants to set some ground rules but wants me to tell her so he doesnt 'look like an a***hole' (his words). The thing is, I'm a very soft person in out of work (I manage poeple so you'd think this should be easy for me) and I dont know how exactly to go about it, I know she will be ok with it but how do I bring it up, do I say, 'oh by the way....'?

Thanks

[grasscarp]

Say to your friend something on the lines of I want to let you know how things get done here. X goes to work at 8 so he needs the bathroom at this time etc. Rubbish gets collected on x and we recycle etc say all you want to say. Do it asap so she knows what you expect from her. She will probably like to know these things rather than be told afterwards eg we don't like you smoking in bed.

[coccinelle]

You can always ask her first, how she's finding things at your house. Then you can tell her how things work. Some things can be said in a joking way too.

[boxtops]

It's very different managing a team at work, to dealing with things on a personal basis.

[keyplus90]

Why don't you ask her about her opinion about how you do things and see what she says. Either way you would convey the message too as indirectly you are telling her what you do and what you like to be done. I am sure she will take a hint and in the process she may give you a better advice too.

[atalanta]

Why don't you both go to the Citizens Advice Bureau and see if they have some kind of "Model Agreement" which you can both ( that is, you and the tenant) look at together.
Your husband is behaving in a rather cowardly fashion, isn't he - leaving all this to you ? I bet he'll blame you if it all goes wrong, too.

[HowardKennitby]

My hubby wants to set some ground rules

What do you want?