Mad over fifties Club

[ladyalex]

The Club is now Open.


Good evening and welcome one and all.

Members are advised to take especial care in the corridors this week as polishing has been done 'with a will'. This is odd, as it is usually done with floor polish and a duster, but who am I to question such things ?


Please leave your raffle contributions on the usual table in the hall.

So far we have:

A tin of John West pink salmon (sell by date obscured by rust)

A box of Milk Tray (soft centres only, hardly any with teeth marks)

A box of dental floss. (unused).

[BigMac]

For the ruffle:

one banker's bonus (used)
one measure of public oprobium
two dashes of political bandwagon jumping
half a packet of spring onion crisps (BB 12 Feb 1998)

A scintilla sounds meagre - may I have a double?

And my coat - a relic of a bygone age - needs refrigerating with the brooms.

I shall be in the Library with a candle stick and the maid>

[Sir Alec]

LIK, it's Dinky the elephant who is secreted about my person. The mice would tickle too much!

[DaisyNonna]

Your Maj, I would appreciate it if you could keep the mice away from my cape, they seem to enjoy a nibble. Another tailcock if you please, they are delicious.

[Lie-in King]

One large Scintilla, sir - please be careful which maid, as some have been undergoing martial-arts training under Matron's tutelage...

Miss Sir A - I wouldn't have thought it possible, frankly

[BigMac]

Just rememembered that Noah's Ark was made of wood, and Joan of Ark was Maid of Orleans.

My coat, please... ... ...

[Lie-in King]

Your flagon, Miss Daisy - your cape is quite safe in the hermetically-sealed secret coat 'n' cape cranny (cloaks also accepted)

[Jumbo747]

I really fancy a hot dog, Mamya............and did you say Game-pie?
What exactly were you playing (at) while baking?

[Mamyalynne]

Scullery secrets am afraid, what the staff get up to is our business LOL

[ladyalex]

Good evening, Big Mac. Delighted to see you again.

Please unhand my maid...unless she tells you otherwise...

[Mamyalynne]

Hot dogs are ready, lashings of onions and mustard aplenty.

[Sir Alec]

A spare hot dog may entice Dinky back down. He's rather fond of them.

[Mamyalynne]

With or without onions??

[DaisyNonna]

Is that not canisism?

[Sir Alec]

No onions, Mamya. You don't want an elephant with flatulence at the party,

[Mamyalynne]

Is that dogs??

[Mamyalynne]

Righto, maybe some cheese??

[ladyalex]

A bit of dogma here ?

[ladyalex]

Cheesism now ?

Can we talk of nothing nowadays for fear of the PC police ?

[BigMac]

I'm afraid the maid Rebekah has galloped off on Shergar (borrowed from the Met) in pursuit of another nobleman from the east - Loo Kan.

I'm sorry Milady, but I did unhand her...

Another scintilla before the tabloids take effect, please, L-i-K.

[Jumbo747]

A bit of advice that I was once given, Sir A, is ...................never hide behind an elephant