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Shoplifting

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Bonkers123 | 16:02 Fri 07th Aug 2015 | Law
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I appear to have become a petty shoplifter over the last few weeks .I have no idea what is happening to me ,but i have been taking chocolate from my local sweetshop over the past few weeks .I have finally been caught and i am terrified .He keeps knocking at my door and is threatening to call the police .I gave him 20.00 but he says he wants more .I think i am in the middle of a breakdown ....I have just come off anti-depressants but don't think i am coping so well .My Dr does not know i have come off them after nearly a year and a half ...but i can't bear depending on them anymore .Please help me ,he is here now and saying he will call the police ...i don't know what to do ....i am shaking ...please help ...i have been through so much recently regarding abuse ...
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Ok- we at Ab are not on the spot. deep breath, listen - let this person summon a PC. Explain to the PC that you are in the middle of a crisis and nees access to mental health and medical services.
Given that the police aren't turning up to burglaries I doubt it's gonna happen for a Mars. So wait till the shouty ,man goes away. Don't open the door to him. Then phone the samaritans, sit down, have a cuppa, and get your help organised.
But don't open the door to that shouty man come what may.
Question Author
I have court next week with my ex again ,this is the 4th time ....he keeps coming to my door ,i have given him £20.00 ..he wants more .My children and everyone around me are going to know soon ..i am dying from embarrassment .Why am i stealing choclate day after day ,i dont even like the stuff ...i am terrified to tell my kids that i actually think i am on the verge of a break down ...god help me .....thank you very much ...
Has he gone away yet B? Any sign of PC? How you doing?
Make an urgent appointment with your GP. Explain what has been happening. He is there to help you and refer you to a specialist if necessary. You should not have stopped taking your medication, it needs to be reduced gradually but only under your GP's instructions. This could be your problem, you have been prescribed the medication for a reason. Make that appointment asap.
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I have just sent the shop assistant away ,he says he is waiting in the shop for me to see the cctv ...i know i have done it and gave him the money ....he is bullying me i feel and he has taken money of me yet is still threatening to call the police ..i don't want to get arrested .The shop is next to the pub and my ex is in there ,so i have to pass it to get the shop and everyone is outside ...i cannot bear it ...i have tried to phone my Dr ,but she is not in until Monday .My son has just came in and i told him ...he doesn't seem bothered .I do feel like he is bullying me ...he appears to be taking the law into his own hands .Shall i ignore the door if he comes back again ? I cannot deal with the police ...it is all i have done over the last year because of domestic abuse ...my ex is on a suspended sentence and has a restraining order ...but i have court again next week with him for another matter ..i think it is all taking its toll .Thank you so much for helping me ..
Being able to talk over your problem on here will help you. I would be inclined to stay in and not open the door to the shopkeeper. You have probably paid more than you have taken anyway. Make that appointment with your GP and tell her you have stopped taking your medication, could this be the problem. She will no doubt suggest you go back on them again until things have stabilized.
Question Author
I have tried to ring my Dr ,she isn't in until Monday .I have noticed my mood has changed over the last few weeks ,i seem angry all the time ? I have no zest in me ...I can afford these sweets ,why am i doing it ? Yes i need to get back on meds for a while ...well at least until court is over again i think .What shall i do if the police turn up ,will they take me away ? I am so scared and ashamed .Thank you guys ..talking is helping for sure .ty
Next time the man comes to your door, tell him that if he threatens you again, you will call the police and tell them that he is blackmailing you. That`s what he is doing and he probably has more to fear from the police than you do.
It sounds like he is a bully. Maybe you should call the police for harassment as you have made recompense for chocolate taken. If he wants to take it further then that's up to him but think a word from the police may solve your problems.

As has already been said, please make an appointment to see your GP as soon as possible. Meantime, give Samaritans a ring. They will listen and are completely confidential and non judgemental.

Take care x
Question Author
He is a horrible man .He so rude to everyone ,he talks terribly to his customers and is rude to the children .He is sleazy beyond a doubt .I buy my cigarettes daily in there ,yet steal a bar of chocolate daily also ? Yes i need help ,i am feeling overwhelmed with the control my ex appears to still have over me regarding the court case .I am sitting here shaking .He has taken the money yet wants me to go to the shop still ? I will not open the door again .My children will be home at anytime ,what shall i do ? They are going to find out as i am sure they will be banned from the shop now also ...oh what a mess i have created .Thank you for taking the time to talk to me ,i feel a lot better ..but scared .
If you do go to the shop take somebody with you - as a witness and as security.
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Its been 2hrs now and the police have not been .I have called my GP and cannot get to her until Monday ....I suddenly feel very calm ,i am not sure if that is a good thing .I just want to sleep now .
Are you saying that you gavel imp money which he acceoted and he is still coming to harass you?

What does he hope to achieve?
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Yes i gave him money ,but he wants me to go to the shop and watch the cctv ,i know what i have done ,i knew i was doing it but i just didn't care ...i just took it and gave it to the kids in the street that he was rude too ,is always rude to ,he is disgusting to women also ,he makes disgusting remarks and smirks .He is new and seems to think he is gods gift to women .Everybody here dislikes him .I have spent thousands in that shop over the years ...why have i never ever done anything like this before ? The police have not been ,but he can call them at any given time i am on tenderhooks here ...he is open until 11.He also told my children and they are disgusted .I have brought shame on them ...i need help i know ...i shall get it asap ..i dont want this to escalate ..i am angry at everyone and anything ...i cannot face court again ...this last year has been court case after court case ...my ex abused me in so many ways .......i know it is no excuse but the meds did help and i should not have thought i could cope without them atm ...i cannot .....thank you so much for helping ...i really appreciate it .I still don't know what to do .......i am scared ...
Tell him to call the police, I think the worse that will happen is you may get a caution. Also tell him that you are going to call the police and tell them that he has been harassing you for money and keeps coming back to your house for more.
Could you get a friend to come and stay with you to bring you comfort and to be a witness should this disgusting excuse of a man come back again?
'this disgusting excuse of a man'

You only have the opinion of the OP who has been stealing from him and want some sympathy. There are two sides to every story!
Question Author
If he comes when the shop is closing ,i shall call the police on 101.He has also told all my children ,yes they are all adults and are pretty upset ...but they also know i am not very well and are insisting i go to my GP asap which i will .They are upset that i have done this and didn't tell them how i was feeling .They went in the shop on there way home from work ...each of them ( i have 3) and delighted in telling them i am a thief .Everyone will know ......i am so ashamed .
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No i don't want sympathy ..i wanted help as to how to handle it ....he is a rather disgusting man though ,he has asked me numerous times if he can marry my beautiful daughter when she is ripe .she is 19 .He talks about her all the time so does the assistant ,i have asked them to stop and be respectful ...they do not listen .
No,excuse for stealing from him tho is it?

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