what to do?

[samantha101]

okay i am one of 4 children. i hve one real sister and my dad got re-married and had twins. I am teh oldest of them alll so my mom tells mea lot more. and then my dad and i get into arguement s and i go off on him. i am afraid to go to my parnets because theya re just going to put each other down. can someboy here please help me.

tahnk you for yur time.

[ethanryan]

do you not have a best friend or a nan or aunt you can turn to. your parents shouls not put each other down, you already know they dont like each other but they should respect the fact that they are still your mother or father. whatever you hear just dont repeat or if ur mom startd puttin your dad down just politely tell her you dont want to listen to it and walk away. because you say u are the oldest and that ur mom can talk to you more she may forget sometimes that you are her daughter and not a friend. speak to your mom and tell her you dont like it when she puts your dad down and the same with your dad. it is so hard been in the middle, my parents split when i was young and you just want to try and keep them both happy, but you cant.

[showcatbenga]

Hi smantha101,
I agree with ethanryan. You need to speak to each of your parents seperately. Make yourself some notes on what you want to say to each of them & what needs to be said to both of them. This is so that you don't get distracted by them changing the subject - they are not used to listening to you in this way & the idea will take some getting used to. Tell them how all this upset makes you feel - insecure, torn in two, etc. & tell them that you cannot take any more - all this is their problem & they are not to try to score points off each other using you. You are the 'child' & they are not behaving responsibly like 'adults' should! But don't try to make them in the wrong, stick to how you feel & what you would like to happen to change things.
Remind them that you have the needs of a daughter, to be supported, etc. & that by behaving this way they are both letting you down.
If you cannot get any where with this talk to your doctor, Yes, they will listen to you. Yes, they will be able to refer you to services that can help, ie, counselling for you on your own plus family counselling to sort out your parents. Don't worry, you won't be taken into care & your parents won't get into trouble but you do need help getting them to take your feelings seriously.
I hope things get better really soon - thinking of you.

[samantha101]

i have had conceling and stuff.... i dont want to even talk about this **** anymore because its not like anythignppl are repsondiong too...it is so hard to explain so what ever.