Teenage Pregnancy in The AnswerBank: Parenting

I think TTFresh may mean that at 17 you don't really know much, although you think you know it all and are invincible. In fact at 17, you don't know what you don't know!!

Gevs1966

Jills, I'm afraid that's classified information, however all 'Gevs' answers seemed to just disappear one day. Seems funny to me that my answers started appearing round about the same time though.......coincidence??

jills

we're getting into the territory of known unknowns and unknown unknowns here....but yes, I know what he meant/you mean Dr Phil. I was kind of being tongue in cheek after a reply he posted on a different subject.

sineadfoofus

ah mate dont worry about all the dodgy looks that you get from people. I got pregnant with my first child when i was 14 and people made all sorts of nasty remarks. I was in a catch 22 situation where i wasnt old enough to work but i wanted to support myself and my child, in the end my mum and dad ended up having to support me and my son until i was 15 when i got a job. a lot of the criticism i was faced with was from my peers who thought that i was a worthless trollop. i just smiled and let them carry on. im the one whos laughing now, as most of them are in the same boat now as i was then. im currently studying full time at uni and i have a part time job.. i never usually judge people on face value but i saw one of these girls the other week and she tried to be all nice to me (she seemed to forget the way she spoke to me) upshot is.. shes one of the single mothers every tax payer hates... the ones with the cant work wont try attitude. hmmm i seem to have yapped a fair bit lol. anyway the moral to the story is... dont worry about these narrow minded people who appear to look down on you, they usually have a few skeletons in the closet themselves its just theirs arent as visible as yours ;) Good luck with the baby and i hope all is well.

sineadfoofus

ah mate dont worry about all the dodgy looks that you get from people. I got pregnant with my first child when i was 14 and people made all sorts of nasty remarks. I was in a catch 22 situation where i wasnt old enough to work but i wanted to support myself and my child, in the end my mum and dad ended up having to support me and my son until i was 15 when i got a job. a lot of the criticism i was faced with was from my peers who thought that i was a worthless trollop. i just smiled and let them carry on. im the one whos laughing now, as most of them are in the same boat now as i was then. im currently studying full time at uni and i have a part time job.. i never usually judge people on face value but i saw one of these girls the other week and she tried to be all nice to me (she seemed to forget the way she spoke to me) upshot is.. shes one of the single mothers every tax payer hates... the ones with the cant work wont try attitude. hmmm i seem to have yapped a fair bit lol. anyway the moral to the story is... dont worry about these narrow minded people who appear to look down on you, they usually have a few skeletons in the closet themselves its just theirs arent as visible as yours ;) Good luck with the baby and i hope all is well.

sineadfoofus

LOL just to get the point accross i posted it twice :D oopsies!

lauralane

You are getting dirty looks because quite frankly 17 is too young to have a baby. If I had had a baby at 17 it would have limited me in so many ways. Did you not want to go to university? You seem very proud that you are pregnant, that�s great and good luck but I have to say you would have been more experienced if you had waited till your 20�s. However this all said if you are so pleased to be pregnant you shouldn't care what others think you should just be thinking about your new arrival.

Joannah

Although I was 19 when I had my little girl I have also put myself through college and university (achieving better than average grades in both) during which I also worked part-time. I am now a manager in my chosen profession and I do not feel as if my daughter or myself have missed out in any way. When I'm off work we regularly go on short breaks together both abroad and here and regularly visit the theatre, cinema or just spend time chilling out. I feel that I am growing up with her and we both make the most of the opportunities that this gives us, exploring the world!!! So I think your life and that of your child is what you make it! As for these idiots who seem to think they can look down there noses at us my daughter and I always say I wonder when their last time on bouncy castle was? or if they've seen the sun rising over the pyramids in egypt? or if they saw Harry Potter on opening night and had to share a chair cause there was the only one space left! At the end of the day when your baby is born everyone else's opinion no longer matters your baby is the most important person in the world and a long with that my daughter is also my best friend!

I wish you all the luck in the world, relax and enjoy it!

-- answer removed --

smudge

Hear, hear Joannah!

I have only just come back to this thread & noticed that someone asked how I dressed after I had 'our' two daughters!

Well absolutely no different to before I had them. Up until I had them, I worked in an office & was always smartly dressed. Why should I change my dress sense just because I've had children? On casual days, I wore smart casual, never went out without a little bit of makeup on & my hair was always long clean & tidy.

I went back to work when they were 6 & 9 years old & settled into school life. I worked my way up the ladder to Company Secretary, at the same company for 26 years, until my boss retired!

Some people who have careers first & children much later in life, shouldn't tar us 'young' Mums with the same brush. I know many an 'older' Mum, including a sibling, who envy the fact that we 'grew up' with our children.

We are still young enough to enjoy our Grandchildren, swimming, have snowball fights, shuffle through the autumn leaves & dance with them! I think I'll go & have a nap now!

Oneeyedvic

Just to be curious........

you say that you are 17, have a good, stable job, a steady boyfriend and your own house........

I am not sure I understand......I assume you have worked since you left school (which would normally be 16). This means you can't have had much more than one years work, so I am confused as to (a) know that your job is good - in that you really don't have much of a comparisson, and (b) why you think that working for one year makes it a 'steady' job.

You say that you have been with your boyfriend for 18 months, which would have made you 15 when you went out with him. On the assumption that he is older than you, would this make him a rapist if you had sex before you were 16?

You say that you have your own house - is this rented or purchased - on the assumption of your age (you would have to have comitted fraud to be mortgaged), I would guess that this is rented - so not really 'your own'.

Lot of assumptions there, just curious as to how true any of the above are.

And I am sorry, but being of Asian origin, I get totally differnt looks if I am in a suit or in torn jeans - fact of life - everyone makes assumptions. Might not be nice but we can't help it!

smudge

oneeyedvic - I assume your answer is for one_mad_cow.

Oneeyedvic

Yes smudge.....I know you're not 17 ;-)

ikefoona

Whether you are 16 or 36 it is your right to have a baby and happy family. What difference does it make how old you are? If you and your man are happy then chances are your new bubs will be happy too and surely thats all that matters!! Tell everyone to get a life and come into the 21st century...

Good luck : )

justincase

�Get a life and come into the 21st century� What on earth are you talking about? You think because we are in the 21st century people should be having babies at 16. My god you are suffering from a lack of education and understanding. At 16 or 17 you are still a child. No one has a steady job and stable family home to raise a child at this age (unless you have a lot of help from mum and dad) I�m sorry but no one can argue and say that 16 is the ideal age to start a family.

ginger 69

Ignore them all. I had my first child at 15 the week before i was due to sit my exams and all i got was hassle. Even my hospital notes had a big red sticker on the front saying TEENAGE PREGNANCY! Im now a happy mother of 3 ( i wanted a son to go with my 2 girls!) and i don,t care about other people. I have loads of qualifications, my own house, a lovly partner ( childrens dad!) a car and most of all my self respect. and i am only just 22! good luck

justincase

Ginger you sound so proud. let me ask you this, do you hope your 2 daughters get pregnant at 15? Why on earth were you sleeping with someone at such a young age. How sad.

Hamish

This made me think of another situation and ask, are you sure they are 'dirty looks' or just looks. Often when someone else close is going through pregnancy you cannot help but look at others going throught the same thing. Parhaps you are imagining the thoughts that are going through thier heads because of the way society has delt with these things in the past.

I watched a program on racial decrimination a few years ago. An asian girl was asked to do some door to door canvassing and was convinced that the negative responce she got was due to her race. When she repeated the work made up as a white european she recieved the same responce and had to conclude that the problem was that people didn't like door to door canvassers rather then objected to her race.

-- answer removed --

Teenage Pregnancy

Answers