Children moving back and forth between custody home and visiting parent's home

[Anjaza]

I'm not sure if I really have a question or are meerly seeking consoling being in my situation. Maybe someone out there in a similar situation can just give a bit of advice how they handled and felt in a similar situasion. I got divorced in 2004 and having court order and custody i located with my 3 boys, (aged 13, 10, 4) to another province (300km from my ex) We lived in peace and eventhough not being able to live in luxury i managed to support us well enough. Mid 2005 my ex starts asking if the boys can go and live with him for some time. I refused but early 2006, after returning from holidays at the ex the boys themselves aksed if they can go and live with their dad. If was'nt raised in the presise words but he and his new wife (and her 11year old daughter) were now living in a big house and had dogs and bicycles (which i did not have) They pleaded and cried they miss their father terribly and why is he so bad that they can not go live with him. Truth is a was a good father while we were married and I never doubted he was able to take care of the boys (he would be able to even if nor re-married) After much deliberation and discussions I though I would be selfish if I didn't at least give them the change to go and live with him (and in the process see the grass is not always greener on the other side) so i agreed, but on condition that we draw up a contract between us stipulating that it's only till the end of the year. April they left and stayed with him. By then I had met my partner (who is still with me today but we havn't married as yet) I went down to visit the boys practically every month and would stay over at friends for the weekends with the boys. By July 2006 the exuses of why the boys were not able to see me for weekends and the holidays started to pile up as did the court orders where my ex now sued me for maintenance. I was quite taken back as the "contract" between us stated that he would not engage in such actions (2 be continued)

[bednobs]

hi, i can't fnd your second part but from the title i guess it's about the travelling etc.
could you move nearer them? I would say that the movement of the children between the homes is the responsibility of both parents (ie half and half) untill the children are able to travel on their own
I would also guess that a court order overrides a contract that you have between the two of you and without knowing any further cirumstances, it seems fair for you to pay mantenance for them.