I recently broke up with my ex because he would be fine with me one day.. and then the next week he'd completely blank me and wouldnt even answer my texts or calls. even though we broke up, hes now come back saying he really really likes me and hes sorry for being useless... the problem is though i still love him, but i dont trust him to not do it again as ive already given him 2 chances and he's blown it. I really like someone else aswell but cant seem to let go of him. any advice?
snow_white18 Sun 31/08/08 13:19
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The problem is that hes not useless, just not communicating with you, there must be a reason for him ignoring you....you say you dont trust him, has he cheated on you?
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Question Author
no i just mean i dont trust him not to turn funny and ignore me like that again. cause it always ends in me having to say fine we're obviously over and then not speaking for months till he comes back and says sorry again.
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I agree with legend.....thats what i did......many years ago now .....but it works!
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Have you sat down with him and asked him why?
My ex had major communication problems, he'd rather sit on his Ar$e for about 17 hours a day playing video games than talking to me.
He might have past problems with relationships that need resolving. I think you two need to sit down and talk before deciding it's over.
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Question Author
yeah i think your right 'ChocolatChip' thanks. he does have communication problems.
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I agree with lil75, there has to be some reason. Maybe he's cheating on you, but I wouldn't accuse him of even that.
You could give him a very last chance but try to keep communication up; keep a close eye on him (but not too close or he'll become suspicious).
Maybe ask him where he's going and ask if you could come (if you do choose to go back with him) - there is an answer to all this and you should be able to find it son enough (a private, serious chat maybe?)
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why not try couple counselling to help yee communicate better
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How long have you been together? And how old are you both?
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Question Author
i could ask him to have a serious chat with me but hes not really one for the whole 'serious talks' he just avoids questions and turns it into a joke. maybe im better off without him. its turning into more hassle than he's worth.
thanks for all your advice, it was helpful x
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Question Author
we were on and off for a year.. and im 18.. hes 24. and hes the one acting imature. its silly
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Yeah I agree completely. It's not worth couple's counselling after a year. And I'm 18 and my Ex was 23, and he was exactly the same. Couldn't hold a decent conversation, and would just avoid it. We lasted 2 years (even living together) And we broke up about a month ago.
You'll feel a lot more free without him. It's a lot of weight of your shoulders!
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Question Author
ah yeh that sounds just like my ex! your right though, better off without them. thankyouu :)
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That final post..."That sounds just like my ex..."
nah, i won't even comment :)
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Question Author
sorry..? i dont get that...
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ChocolatChip was saying about her relationship; then you said that was like yours (any connection?)
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Question Author
lol i like that! yeah i will do, ta.
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Nah, I doubt it. I know where my boyfriend was at all times. Upstairs in his room playing his xbox. While I tidied around him.
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knew* even, and ex-boyfriend.
I think i need a cup of balck coffee.
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you had given him 2 chances which is more than enough, people rarely change, If you do not like the person he is then move on, when you are lamenting about the past, remind yourself of why you chose to break up with him.
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this sounds very familiar to what happened to me.
if you have doubts then dont go back to him, theres no doubt he'l do it again and again! u have already given him chances...
take a break from this relationship thing and dont rush into a new one. enjoy your singleton for a while and explain this to the new guy to give u some time. if he really likes u he will wait for you! u can just start of with mates with him etc. xx
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