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Could you be friends with someone who is basically a BNP supporter?

Hi
I went to the pub with some friends last night, some of the girls had brought their other halves with them and soon there were loads of us.

I ended up talking to the boyfriend of one of my friends who i had only had passing conversation with...and the conversation was going well, until he started coming out with extremely right wing stuff. First it was immigration, he had some strong views on that (kick 'them' all out), then it was 'the gays' as he put it, then he started spouting on about how the British empire had fallen, how he was almost ashamed to be British because 'we don't stand up for ourselves', the 'black on black' knife crime that white British lads aren't involved in is dragging the country down and he just had some very strong opinions. Many of them i disagree with. He didn't seem to understand that black teenagers in this country ARE British as well as the white ones!!

My question is, I think he was verging on 'offensive' and i was offended by some of the stuff he was saying, so does that mean I can't be friends with him? He said his gf thought the same as him (first id heard of it) and if he wanted to vote BNP, she would too!!! I was thinking, if my girl mate was to do this...i dont know if i could be friends with someone who voted BNP and agreed with all that.

Or should i just think 'we are all entitled to our own opinions' and take what he says, but leave it at that?

Hmmm


sunchime  Sun 21/09/08 17:42
weeal
Sun 21/09/08
17:43
BNP or otherwise - I would think it hard work listening to all that opinionated stuff from anyone.
The Builder
Sun 21/09/08
17:50
.................two things I've always felt strongly about are .....religion, and racism..........or in this case, extreme nationalism. Friends?..............acquaintances or colleagues maybe..............but "friends" ???
daffy654
Sun 21/09/08
17:52
I couldn't be frinds with someone whose politics and opinions differed to mine so much! I can't abide bigots anyway.
daffy654
Sun 21/09/08
17:52
^^^ "friends"
sunchime
Sun 21/09/08
18:17

Question Author

I was thinking that too...about not being able to be friends with someone with such extreme views. But then i thought, surely everyone is entitled to their own opinion? Shouldn't I just let him get on with it if that's what he thinks??
MrBen5
Sun 21/09/08
20:30
Hmmm, i dont understand how you cant be friends with someone who doesnt have the same beliefs as you?
I dont agree with abortions, but i wouldnt say i cant be friends with someone who has one.
I dont agree with cheating, but again, i wouldnt not be friends with someone just because of it.
It would annoy me, but i dont expect everyone to have the same views as me.
If they did, this world would be a much better place...
In A Pickle
Sun 21/09/08
20:31
To answer your question:
NO,not in a thousand years! (would they be my friends).
YES.they are entitled to their own (if lawful) opinions,but it doesn't mean I have to have them as my friends.
We all choose our own friends (I hope) and if a friend of mine "went" BNP,then they would no longer be my friend.

MrBen5
Sun 21/09/08
20:33
Hmmm, so if a friend of yours had a view which differed to yours , you would merely disown them?
I bet you have a lot of honest friends...
Leapers
Sun 21/09/08
20:43
one of my best friends is a ssupporter of BNP and im more of a green party supporter we have our little heated discussions and basically let him think what he wants whether i think he is wrong or not. he also verges on racist but i think everyone must have extreme views on something but he will always apologise if he thinks he has offended me but its his opinion so you cant stop that, let them get on with it hopefully BNP will never get voted in if they do then i hope some nicer country will let us in1
weeal
Sun 21/09/08
20:46
I think the point is that he came out with all this on first meeting and was vocal about it at a social evening, thats different from friends having their own views and not spouting off
flobbergob
Sun 21/09/08
20:52
All line up, take your turn, and jump on this thread to demonstrate what a fantastic politically correct and balanced wonderful person you are. What you forget sunchime, is that the "BNP supporter" that you found offensive (mainly to drum up support on here) is perfectly entitled to his view. If you don't like it, then that is TOUGH while you live in a free and democratic society. If you don't like Britain, then clear off to a country which will acommodate your views and prejudices - because you are as prejudiced and racist as the man you are complaining about.

You name a couple maybe?

andy-hughes
Sun 21/09/08
21:23
Can you be friends with someone who has different views than you? Of course.

Can you be friends with someone who's views are extreme and racially biased? Probably not.

Yes, everyone is entitled to their views, but not to espouse them to the discomfort and distress of others. Remember, the concept of free speech doesn;t allow you to shout 'Fire!' in a crowded theatre.

I am left-wing by nature, one of my closest friends is a Conservative, and we enjoy spirited debates from time to time, but neither of us hold views of such extreme that voicing them would upset the other, and that is where your issue lies.

If you accept that this guy is right-wing, fine. If he upsets and offends you by voicing his views in spite of your differing stance, then that is not a basis for friendship, which must be based on mutual respect or it is without value.
daffy654
Sun 21/09/08
22:44
Of course he is entitled to his own views and opinions,as am I.
I have gay relatives and a gay stepson and friend so anyone who hated them purely because of their sexuality would be unwelcome in our circle of friends.
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