Drowned Child

[flip_flop]

This is a desparately sad accident.

However.

The biological mother (she certanly hasn't shown any maternal instincs to warrant being called anything other than 'biological) is consulting lawyers because "I feel really angry. I want justice done. I want to know what, where, why and how"

and

"When you are a foster parent you have to have eyes in the back of your head. They've got to take even more special care. They get paid loads a week to look after that child"

Still

She "...went straight away to see about getting a tattoo done in memory of the little one"

This woman has two other children by two other fathers also in care.

This would be laughable if it wasn't so tragic.

Clearly this bloody woman couldn't give a tinker's cuss about her kids, and as usual with people like this, she's starting to think about getting a few quid out of it.

Can anybody believe she is actually questioning the actions of the foster carers?

[sp1814]

flip_flop - can you supply a link to the story please.

[Gromit]

As might have been predicted, it is from the Daily Mail

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles /news/news.html?in_article_id=472252&in_page_i d=1770

[jno]

probably this one, sp1814

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,,213 8122,00.html

I don't know her well enough to know anything about her maternal instincts, but I can imagine this one failing to get to court

[redcrx]

consulting lawyers? what does she want, justice for her child or compensation???

[confused79]

She has a put on face for sadness it looks to me, sorry to judge but seems she is enjoying the puiblicity, she is so contradicting in her statements, saying 'she has a heart of gold' talking about the foster carer, and then 'she brought my daughter up for past year', and then 'i hate her'.

Does she think she would have been able to keep her safe more then, obviosuly not if she is in care in the first place she obviously was not fit to look after her.
Dont get me wrong im not saying she does not have a right to be angry, but surely anger should not come before greiving, where is this going to get her!!!

[flip_flop]

Are you suggesting it isn't true because it appeared on the Daily Moan site Gromit? Does it satisfy you that it also appeared on The Grauniad?

[Gromit]

flip_flop

The story is undoubtedly true. The tragic death was reported in several newspapers and webnews sites. The stuff about her having a tattoo appears to be exlusive to the Mail's report (though I may be wrong). I couldn't find any of that stuff in jnos Guardian link.

The adoption and subsequent death of the child is just a tragedy.

[NISSA]

My stepson was placed in foster care wrongly by Social Services, they accused the mother (wrongly I might add) of certain things and she had all her kids removed, youngest son (my hubbys child) was placed in foster care, we imediatly went for custody whilst the bio mother was investigated. Social Services ruined that womans life, we eventually got custody after stepson had been in care for 18 months (he was 3 at the time), however the point I am trying to make is that we do not know the circumstances of why that woman had her children removed, there have been hundreds of cases of wrongful removal by Social Services yet here I see people assuming that the monther must be in the wrong. Plus the mother is right to question why the foster carer was not keeping an eye on the daughter and why there was not either a cover on the pool or a barrier around it, after all these foster carers are supposed to be better suited to care for children then the people whome the children have been removed from.

I can also understand the mothers conflicting feelings towards the foster carer, there were many times when stepson was in care that I alternated between hating the woman who had my stepson (she bought him up contray to his dad's wishes, be bacame very spoilt in her care) and also understanding that it does take a special type of person to take on children like that. I will say though in our case the foster carer has never been in contact since stepson was placed with us full time.

Maybe we should not judge unless we have the full facts.

[flip_flop]

Three children by three different men. Father of the child is an itinerant. All three kids in care. It doesn't say whether she is unemplyed or not, although I think it is probably a fair bet to say she is.

You may be right NISSA that social services have wrongly removed 100s of kids, but they have also correctly removed 1000s, possibly tens of thousands, and I'd bet my mortage that this womans kids were correctly removed.

[Gromit]

"Three children by three different men. Father of the child is an itinerant. It doesn't say whether she is unemplyed or not, although I think it is probably a fair bet to say she is. "

May not be the lifestyle we would all choose flip_flop, but non of the above is actually an offense. Are you saying the unemployed should have their children taken away?

[NISSA]

The mother of my stepson has 5 children by 5 different men. One dad is a pervert, who she had locked up as soon as she found out he had tried to do something, the other men (with the excpetion of my hubby and he first husband) all abandoned their kids. Is this the mothers fault?
She has never had a job in her life, yet she is not a bad person. I know many people who left school pregnant, never worked and who have two or three kids by different men but who are great mothers.
Being slightly judgemental I beleive.

[flip_flop]

Five kids by five different men!!! Christ. She may not be a bad mother, but by christ she is an old slapper - she should learn to keep her bloody legs shut.

None of the points I made and mentioned by Gromit are illegal and let's assume for the sake of the argument that whatever happened which resulted in her kids being given sancturary was not illegal - but Gromit is right, it is not the lifestyle I choose, I have chosen to have been in employment since leaving education, I have taken the decision to look after my child and to nurture her and to ensure she gets the best life I can provide, I have taken the decision to be a contributing member of society - this woman has chosen to do none of these things and inevitably I will judge other people by my standards: that is just human nature.

[flip_flop]

And who is paying for these five different children by five different men? She obviously isn't, because you say she's never had a job in her life. Are the five different fathers of the five different children paying for them?

If no, then that means I am.

Come on people, doesn't that sort of thing get right up your noses?

[IggyB]

a woman who trusted someone to look after her child has now lost that child - of course she is going to be angry and upset and if there is a hint that the foster parents were negligent then the courts should be involved.

[chitchat]

No one is saying that she should not be angry but going to the papers to tell/sell the story to the world would not have been my first thought.

I agree with flip-flop - you judge eveyone by your own standards. And as standards go she doesnt appear to have many. Still its sad that she has lost a daughter, but sell a story to the papers wont bring her back. Each to their own I suppose.

[joko]

are you suggesting that in an average womans life, 3 partners is excessive?

seriously?

she is 31! thats probably 15 years of sexual activity.
are you saying one man every 5 years is a lot and makes her a slapper? really?

and the other persone mentioned in this thread with 5 partners - thats one every 3 years - you think thats a lot?

what a silly way to think.


parent hood is hardwork and anyone who decides they are not coping well is doing the RIGHT thing if they put those children into care.

you do not know her circumstances.
you have already accused her of not really caring yet when she lashes out in anger she is taking liberties - make you mind up!

[Le Chat]

joko - ff is not suggesting that 5 partners in 15 yrs is alot because it isn't! What is a lot and what he is suggesting,(and it shocked me!) is having 5 different children by 5 different men. Why would anyone do that? Somewhwere along the line (maybe after 2 or even 3 children by different men), you would have to question your descision making process and your choice in reliable men!?

[Goodsoulette]

My aunt has three children by three different men and she is a wonderful mother. We dont know why her children were not in her care and you lot assume she is scum. She may be scum, she may have had postnatal depression and became unable to look after her children. Not everyone has a brilliant support network behind them when things go wrong, often a reason why young women look for love in the wrong places and end up mothering children left, right and centre.

The bond between a mother and child is the strongest there could ever be. Just because she wasnt with her doesnt mean she has to be putting on sadness.

[bundleone]

The fact remains that a young child should be protected by whoever is in charge of it, a pool in a garden should be fenced off or filled in, I am surprised that social services would place a young child with foster parents who have a pool in the garden, around 60 children a year die in garden pools or ponds.

[leg_end758]

sometimes i think some women are looking for a child of every creed and colour.

whats wrong today is lack of stability and the lack of male role models.
this has been reported many times as a cause for the rise in youths lack social concience.

i think the mother in questiuon has a cheek.
im sure its a tragic accident by reading the reports.

as for multiple fathers for multiple kids .
well your choice but not the best idea in my hunble opinion.

though im an idiot apparently.