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| I'm often accused of eavesdropping. I just wish they'd have the guts to say it to my face I was telling a funny gag in the garden today, but the punch line was greeted with silence. Later on, my... |
| I don't attack people. I'm all stalk and no action. I bet Dracula does all his shopping online, just so he can keep clicking on "your account." I rubbed a magic lamp and wished for the genie not to... |
| Did you hear about the man who opened a yacht showroom? Sails went through the roof. My driving instructor told me, never brake if there's an animal in the road. You should have seen the look on the... |
| I followed this white bird with really long legs home the other night. Police are doing me for storking. As a Kid I hated losing, so I played with myself. If you ever get attacked by a tiger just... |
| Well I do. I've just spilt beetroot juice all over my kitchen carpet and as I can't bend (arthritic back) I've just had an interesting half hour trying to clean it up! Good job I can laugh as well. Go... |
| These are sentences exactly as typed by medical secretaries in NHS Greater Glasgow 1. The patient has no previous history of suicide. 2. Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital. 3.... |
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