ChatterBank1 min ago
persistent lying
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.All children discover the concept of lying, and try it out. From an adult perspective, lying is wrong, and should be discouraged. From a child's perspective, a lie presents a possibility of getting away with a wrongdoing, so it's worth a try.
Have you considered that your children are frightened of the disciplinary regime they live with - maybe you are too strict? yes, you have to have guidelines and sanctions, that's how children learn, but if the potential reward for a successful lie is greater than simply owning up - and receiving credit for doing so - then maybe you are on a self-defeating path with them.
Why not sit them down, have a dialogue - as opposed to a lecture - about truth and lies, and then start with some new rules. Wrongdoing - punishment, admittining wrongdoing - maybe a punishment, depending on wrongdoing, but credit for owning up.
Take the fear out of confessing, and you'llget more of it. let your children see you as a guide who is trying to help them, rather than some sort of disciplinarian who is inflexible and hard.
Prenthood is not a set of rules in stone - you have to be flexible and willing to adjst as your children mature, and you learn as you go.
excellent answer andy-hughes ! i wholeheartedly agree with you. my children have never been strictly disciplined, but they do know right from wrong and have grown up to be extremely honest and well behaved.
you are their parents not dictators, - guide them, educate them, but above all love and cherish them or they might turn against you one day.
good luck
we have 3 children too, we dont have many rules in our house, but they know that i will be even more unhappy about the lying than the deed. they have been brought up to be truthful (for the most) and for the most it works.
mind you, punishment is only usually loss of privileges such as no tele or treats.
speaking as a professional, children under the age of 7 dont know the difference between lying and stories so try not to expect too much.
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