Memory loss, alcohol?

[ChocolatChip]

Hi there,
My mother has been a big drinker for many years, drinking half a bottle of brandy an (afternoon/evening) at least. But the Past couple of years I've noticed that her memory has gotten very bad. For example she will ask when I'm working the next day, I will tell her the answer. Then she will ask my a few minutes later, I will say I've told her. And she will say 'you didn't or 'tell me again'
She will then proceed to ask me several times. And then the next day com

[Andyvon]

Many years ago we had a middle-aged couple as neighbours. The man loved gardening and he spent all day working in their garden. His wife spent all day following her husband around the garden and she never strayed more than ten feet from him. If he was weeding she just stood watching and if he mowed the lawn she walked up and down behind him. She even used to follow when he emptied the clippings and then back to the mower to start mowing again. When we were talking she just stood beside him looking around, obviously without knowing who we were or what was going on. He used to call her condition 'dementia' but I think today it would probably be described as Alzheimer's Disease.

My point is that she was only 55 at the time ChocolatChip. I'm not saying that's what your Mum is suffering from but people that age do suffer such diseases. I shouldn't think the brandy has helped either. It might be an idea to get your Mum to her GP and some tests done. Good luck.

[roxie_09]

I don't know if alcoholism would cause such severe memory loss though? I could be wrong as I've never experienced it through family etc. I have worked on wards where people have developed dementia through alcoholism and as young as late 40's. Although the GP may not seem the best answer, maybe talking to your mum explaining that she has all your support and you just want your mind put at ease she may agree to go, as visiting the GP doesnt set anything in stone straight away xx

[goldenbolls]

cc, i am the exact same as your mum, i am a binge drink ( beer only at weekends ) i am only 43 coming 44 next few weeks, i even forget peoples names who i have known, im a welder and scaffolder and ive been out of work not around 1 and 1/2 years because of recession but i even forget all the setting of my welding machine and i forget how to do certain scaffolds now, its terrible, i forget my house number the other day when i was on the phone to the bank. i have had a bad kicking by a group of 14 guys in a pub about 5 months ago ( football related ) nearly got beaten to death with bottles over my head etc, i think my memory was bad even before that kicking . hope ur mum can get off alcohol for good its a terrible curse. good luck

[Wak]

CC, is it possible for you to see her doctor on the quiet and explain how you feel and that your mum won't or can't be bothered to see him/her, then, maybe the doctor could make a "routine visit" to see her and check for him/herself??
Just a thought.

[venator]

Well, I'm 71 and get through a bottle of malt, several bottles of wine and half a dozen pints of beer each week.

What was the question again? What am I doing here?

[venator]

Actually, I'm fit as a fiddle, do the Grauniad or Times cryptic crossies most days.
I have trouble with names, but have had that since I was a lad.

[ChocolatChip]

venator. I'm glad you feel as fit as a fiddle. Although can't really agree with you, how do you know you're truly as 'fit' as you feel? God knows how much serious damage you have done to yourself already.

Thank you for everyone else for the support and understanding, I'm yet to talk to her, trying to find the courage. I may even go to my doctor as suggested a couple of times, just to get some advice.
I will let you know if anything happens.

[venator]

Chocolatchip - I'm sorry for being a bit flippant. My mother had Alzheimers, and would ask after her brother, who had died some months before. I'd tell her, and she'd remember, but would ask again a few minutes later. In the end, I just said he was OK, but it was distressing. The thing is, she was happy, with no bad memories.

I'm lucky in that my wife has considerable geriatric experience, having been a Sister on a geriatric ward (before becoming a midwife). I also have a 20 year old daughter (I'm 71), who keeps me up to the mark.

I've also lived with and cared for alcoholics.

You and your mother need help, and there is some excellent advice here.

The thing from which you may take comfort is that she can be quite happy if you can accept and live with her condition. A memory loss is not done on purpose, and she should not be made to feel guilty. It's a bit like looking after a baby, if you can see it that way.

I've not expressed myself as I would like, but I do feel a lot of sympathy...