Friendship continued....

[hazel999]

My previous thread was about a so called best friend who doesnt involve me in her life at all and now seems to be trying to take my friends from me aswell.
Anyway, I grabbed the bull by the horns and told her what I thought, but softened the blow a bit and some how she has managed to twist everything back on me.

Grrrrrrrr.....I'm so angry about it, don't want to throw year's of friendship away, any advice guys and girls x

[cazzz1975]

instead of arguing, you both need to have a calm discussion to find out what is wrong. maybe it could be salvaged, maybe not. at least by confronting what the problems are you have a starting point.
life is too short to have toxic people in your life, however many years you have been friends.

[boxtops]

This is the earlier thread http://www.theanswerb.../Question1003911.html

Hazel, I think I would feel now that the time has come to do just that - close the book. How did you "soften the blow"? - sounds like you have given her something to bite back on. Is it really worth all your energy and emotion to keep this going?

[Purple_Popple]

There is nothing you can do, people like this appear to have a personality problem and they are very clever at doing what they do...i.e. twisting things and making YOU to be the bad person, also alot of people are shallow and easily led so have probably been taken in by this so called friend...you are better than them, you need to swallow this bitter pill and find some other friends that will appreciate you, it all sounds so juvenile but just be yourself and smile, you have to pretend this is not bothering you...hard to do, but its the best way.

[stokemaveric]

if she was a ''true'' friend she wouldnt be so nasty to you would she?? with ''friends'' like her you dont need any enemies.....

[cazzz1975]

okay just read the other thread, personally for my own self respect I would stop hankering after her, she is clearly setting out to upset you, imo there is no friendship from her perspective which is her loss (she may be too self centred to realise the importance of a good friend)

I would avoid her

[DTCwordfan]

agree with the others - dump her soonest - she will just cause you misery.

[boxtops]

I agree with the others - cut loose. If your other friends are real friends, they won't be taken in by her trying to take them away from you. Don't let her see that it's getting to you - rise above it if you can. Life's too short to waste time trying to set things right with someone so self-centred.

[hazel999]

I think your all right, I tried to tell her that friends should be in eachothers lives and her response was 'you have your life, I have mine' but she's involved in my life, my friends, comes out with me and then she commented on my fb status that I'm delibretely trying to stress her out, and some friend I am.
I told her I wanted to meet up to clear the air and not communicate over fb, but she's to busy, yet has time for everyone else including my friend who she barely knows.

Now she and her mum have updated there fb statuse's about me....great!

It seem's its her way or the highway. Sorry for rambling, just a bit shocked and stressed at how this has turned out :o(

[cazzz1975]

your friend "controls" the friendship, which means she can do what she pleases and you fall in line.

not good or healthy, very confidence ebbing. stop talking to her and try to branch out of the little group, it will do you and your confidence a power of good x

[milly143]

They sound like nice mature people. Better of keeping out of it and moving on.

[hazel999]

well im not in her circle anyway so should be quite easy lol

[Purple_Popple]

It is a shock and it hurts too, losing a good friend is like an end to a relationship, you have to grieve, what is doubly hard though is that you have no real reason why all this is happening.............very strange place to be in but you have to rise above this, value yourself, look after No.1 = YOU. :) and keep smiling.

[hazel999]

thank you everyone for your replies :o)

[milly143]

The fact that her and her mother appear to be complete arse wipes should help the recover process. I never understand why people post all their personal arguments on facebook.

Just be happy with the people you know are true friends.

[Purple_Popple]

...and block them from your FB too, let them comment about you, what the eye doesnt see the heart wont grieve about, you cant stop it, but you dont need to read it as it will just make you feel even more bitter and anger will eat you up.