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Amazing Grace

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markieboy | 23:21 Tue 08th Feb 2005 | Phrases & Sayings
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Does anyone know a humourous poem that would be suitable for a pre dinner Grace, i have to provide one at a charity ball but can't seem to achieve the right balance without being disrespectful or unfunny.
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God of goodness, bless our food,

Keep us in a pleasant mood.

Bless the cook
and all who serve us.

From indigestion, Lord preserve us.

Heavenly father, keep us alive. There`s ten for dinner and food for five.

Lord, forgive us that we feast while others starve. Bishop Charles Gore (1853-1932)

These come from "A Book of Graces", compiled by Carolyn Martin and now, I think, out of print.

From Francis Russell
God bless this food
Superfluous
And may it put
No weight on us. 

From Mrs N. M. Barugh
Lord may we eat all we are able
Until our stomachs touch the table

From Jessie and Eric Swan
God be praised that we are not so poor that we lack meat for our stomachs not so rich that we lack stomach for our meat

The last isn't a poem but I like it.
....nor so rich...

Over the teeth, past the gums, look out stomach, here it comes!

My niece taught me one she learned at Cub Scouts.

 

Rub a dub dub

Thanks for the grub!

This is attributed to Burns, but was probably being used before his birth.

Some hae meat and canna eat
And some wad eat that want it
But we hae meat and we can eat
And sae the Lord be thankit


Robert Burns (1759-1796).

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