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where do i go from here?????

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dejucrazy55 | 16:32 Fri 26th Oct 2007 | Body & Soul
13 Answers
the most terrifyin thing happened to me last night..
my sister who is a mandated report had to report my boyfriend ( ex- boyfriend) to the police because of his age....i begged her not to bc i believe there was no need to but she could lose her job and everything shes worked for over it if anyone were to ever find out...
she went so far as getting him researched to get him ( from what she says) and she even went to where he works to find out his age ( cause i lied about it of course)
well last night she came and talked to me about it and said what she is goin to have to do....i told her i wanted to be with her jst so i that i could hear from authoritty what was goin to happen to him....


i dont know what to do...
i want to talk to him...tell him it wasnt my fault i didnt want them to do it......but i mean how is that suppose to help?
i minus well go up to him and say hey sorry my family is selfish but ur life is ruined now...yea i know it may not be ruined but minus well be...
im sooooo confused on where to go from here..
the police said that it may jst blow over do to nothing was forced and stuff...

im jst so emotional i dont know wht to do!!
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I'm confused, your sister is a 'mandated report' - what does this mean?

Why has she reported your ex-boyfriend? What has his age got to do with anything? Why could she lose her job? What have the police got to do with anything?

Am I missing something?
Hmm - dont understand the question ????
erm, think im missing something too! Are you really young and he's old? If you're under 16 and sleeping with someone older than 16, he can be put in prison. If you're under 16 and he's really old, then he's a paedophile and deserves to be in prison! If it's something he can be arrested for, then he would have known it was wrong before he did what ever it was, and therefore it is his own fault.
A mandated reporter.

Without knowing what has happened it is really difficult to help. But she is duty bound to inform of any material matter she knows about which may affect a case. Has your boyfriend been accused of having sex with you and you are underage, wheras he is not?
I would guess you are underage and your boyfriend older and your sister reported him. Might be useful to know the ages involved.
It's serious stuff folks,:

http://www.smith-lawfirm.com/mandatory_reporti ng.htm

http://incestabuse.about.com/od/legalinformati on/a/mandatedrept.htm
cut and paste from the above link:
What is "Mandated Reporting?"
In general, Mandated Reporting laws say that anyone who deals with children -- teachers, daycare workers, social workers, women's advocates, children's advocates, and so on -- are required by law to report any child abuse they find out about.






The law also provides penalties for failure to report. For example, if a child tells his daycare worker that his dad is beating him up, the daycare worker is required to call Child Protection services. Child Protection is part of your county Social Services department. In Minnesota, the daycare worker has to call Child Protection and make a verbal report, and then follow it up with a written report.
Mandated Reporters don't just respond when a kid tells them something. If properly trained, they can spot signs of abuse -- suspicious bruises, signs of neglect, and behaviors that might suggest that the child has been abused, either sexually, physically or emotionally. I knew a remarkable Child Advocate who could walk through a gymnasium filled with children. When she got to the other side, could tell the school counselor about ten or fifteen children who deserved a closer look, and provide details as to why.

When children email me and ask for help or advice, I ask them if they have a favorite teacher they can go to. This is because teachers are also Mandated Reporters, and they tend to be well-trained. Many legislatures pass Mandated Reporter laws, but never appropriate money to pay for
do you want to give the full details deju? I recall you being quite young but are you in the UK?
if this is serious i suggest you get legal or social work help.

if not serious then id advise folk to give this serious subject a wide berth.
I don�t know, I think it is serious.

The points as you have put them are that your sister is bound by law to report this. I think her hands are tied. The fact that you have lied about his age is immaterial, since he knew how old he was. Did he know how old you were? If he did then he is likely to be reported for �Age inappropriate sexual behaviour�. Although the age of consent remains at 16, it is not intended that the law should be used to prosecute mutually agreed teenage sexual activity between two young people of a similar age, unless it involves abuse or exploitation. Unless you are under 13 and he is older, in which case he may well be charge with statutory rape, since under 13�s cannot legally give consent.

In any event, your sister would have to report that this boy (?) has (knowingly) engaged in under age sex, but as I said, without details it is difficult to give precise information.
-- answer removed --
There is no such duty in the UK, however below is an extract from the Child Protection procedures from Dumfries and Galloway and an expalnation, whay we are where we are.

"One of the findings of the Bichard Enquiry related to a concern that the issueof underage sex was not being taken sufficiently seriously by agencies andthat abusive or predatory behaviour may be overlooked leaving childrenexposed to risk.
There are, however, many instances where it is unclear at the start of aprofessional�s involvement whether or not there are child protection concerns.
Legislation is specific with regards to unlawful sexual intercourse but there is
in practice a clear distinction between dealing with a young person who is only
technically a victim having been involved in a truly consensual relationship
and dealing with a young person who is the victim of abuse.
This fundamental difference creates an issue, particularly for health
professionals who have to manage the perceived competing demands of the
need to share information and the need to maintain confidentiality. Guidance
has recently been circulated by the Chief Medical Officer to the effect that
where there is a concern that a child may be at risk of harm, this will always
override a professional or agency requirement to keep that informationconfidential. It is clear that all staff have a responsibility to act to make surethat all children are protected from harm.
It is recognised, however, that it can be difficult to make a judgement on"
Yes in the 'typical' sense but this is her sister, not a stranger or an unknown child.
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im glad everybody has put alot of thought into this matter
to answer some of ur questions...
im not from the uk
i am 16
he was older yes 21 to be exact
we were both aware of one anothers age and the consquences it could lead to
i promised him that it wouldnt lead to this because my family wasnt that stupid and they had respect for me ( i was wrong)

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