Father? Partner?

[FredPuli43]

On the Wright Stuff this morning: Discussing shared bank accounts of fathers and their partners he said "Fartners earn more..". Never heard the father called that !Probably apt, though.
What infelicitous spoonerisms, or ingenious names for a father or partner, have you come up with?

[mccfluff]

d!ckhead

[ummmm]

gobshite.