How it Works1 min ago
Spare The Rod And Spoil The Child?
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I was regularly beaten when I was little. When particularly naughty my feet were sometimes held to the fire.
That never done me any harm.
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//That never done me any harm.///
I assume that was very much T.I.C. remark. From what you have told us of your history I reckon it has done you some harm.
My father was a bully and a tyrant to both me and my mother. I am sure the frequent very hard slaps around my ear with drum damage was the cause of my premature deafness.
barney - // No there ain't, if you smack me it's assault, so how does smacking a 8 year become o.k. //
I don't think there is a one-size-fits-all approach to discipline.
My daughters were all very different - the oldest would take you to the limit shen she got going, the youngest only needed a sideways look to have her bursting into tears.
But I think that, with a small child, a toddler, when reasoning is not going to work, then a light tap on the bottom enforces the message.
I would never condone sustained smacking, or making a child live in fear of being hit, but you have to be proportionate in anything to do with children.
Where modern society is increasingly failing itself, is deciding on a viewpoint, and then acting as though absolutely everyone else sees that viewpoint in exactly the same way.
A three-year-old doesn't see a tap on the bottom as 'assault', or life-changing abuse, they forget in minutes.
By the time is past five or six, then other punishments are appropriate, and no child at or above that age should be smacked.
It's a difficult subject, but every parent knows themselves and their own child best, and you have to accept that their judgement is going to trump some Whitehall suit pronouncing about what everyone should do every day from now to eternity.
That's not how people work.
If you advocating a light tap on the bottom to deter bad behaviour, we both know that unless the child worried about having another one it would not bother them at all, so the smack has to be of sufficient force to hurt, hitting someone is hitting someone, full stop, and it is absolutely indefensible to be trying to justify hitting children.
My mother enjoyed smacking us I'm sure. The bar was very low to what we were allowed to do before she would get 'the stick'. We were frightened of her and in the end all left home as early as we could, although my brother stayed as he never got hit. Yes it's affected me in certain aspects, I can't abide watching violence of any kind on tv and feel physically sick if I see a child being smacked in public. I've raised my children without physical violence and I reckon they are the better for it. Hitting a child is a confession of not being able to cope with the situation and perhaps everyone should be offered parenting skills when they decide to have a family. BTW I Ihope the OP was being sarcastic.😕
