Politics2 mins ago
Please Help.. My Mother In Law Is Dying Of Cancer.
21 Answers
She is in a hospice and my husband vists daily.[only child, after his brother died a few years ago] She could pass away at any time.
He is still working full time, works long hours, and then goes to the hospice after work.
He is exhausted. He takes his tiredness out on me and can be very verbal.
I work part time, and keep everything else going.
We still have all four parents living. They are all in their eighties, and all have health problems.
What is the best way of handling this situation? Please advice me. I am struggling. Many thanks.
He is still working full time, works long hours, and then goes to the hospice after work.
He is exhausted. He takes his tiredness out on me and can be very verbal.
I work part time, and keep everything else going.
We still have all four parents living. They are all in their eighties, and all have health problems.
What is the best way of handling this situation? Please advice me. I am struggling. Many thanks.
Answers
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Has he always been verbally unpleasant when under pressure or is this a recent thing? If the latter, it's going to be easy to simply grit your teeth and find somewhere else to be when he's in this mood. Then when he isn't in that mood, you can find five minutes to sit down quietly and explain that you love him, you're both working incredibly hard under pressure, and would he not do that.
If however it's a behaviour pattern he's always had, it's going to be harder to address it. From his stance, it would seem he's always done this, so 'it's unreasonable' to challenge it now. So you'll need someone else to support you through - maybe a marriage guidance counsellor that you can both sit down with.
Let us know how you're getting on, tough times indeed.
Has he always been verbally unpleasant when under pressure or is this a recent thing? If the latter, it's going to be easy to simply grit your teeth and find somewhere else to be when he's in this mood. Then when he isn't in that mood, you can find five minutes to sit down quietly and explain that you love him, you're both working incredibly hard under pressure, and would he not do that.
If however it's a behaviour pattern he's always had, it's going to be harder to address it. From his stance, it would seem he's always done this, so 'it's unreasonable' to challenge it now. So you'll need someone else to support you through - maybe a marriage guidance counsellor that you can both sit down with.
Let us know how you're getting on, tough times indeed.
Forgive him everything , he only has one mother and she will only die the once, so he has no experience against which to judge his own actions, to talk about his pain, his lose, his feelings............. when my ex-husbands mother died he and by association me and my daughter went thru hell but he didnt mean to hurt us, he just couldnt help himself................his pain overwhelmed him and being a man he just couldnt express it.......
Just for this time have faith in your love and let him deal with his pain in his own way...............its not nice, its not fair but it just is..................he will one day come back .......................
I feel for youPxx
Just for this time have faith in your love and let him deal with his pain in his own way...............its not nice, its not fair but it just is..................he will one day come back .......................
I feel for youPxx
I am sorry to hear about your husbands mother. I am an only child and my father died 2 years ago. I was 28. It's something that you grow a strength with, and you just handle it. I handled it very well, but I did just get on with it, you adopt a strength. But I dont think I would be working. I would be on compassionate leave. Its too much working, no one could handle that. Suggest that he goes on leave from work for a while. Good luck, I'll say a prayer for his mother
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