Worst Case Scenario, I'm A Nervous Wreck

[MaryDevlin50]

hello

my son, who is 38, was questioned last week by the police regarding a sexual assault he allegedly carried out on a 9 year boy when my son was only 11 years old.

ive no idea what's behind the accusation and my son, who knows the person in question hasn't got a clue where this is coming from and denies the allegation. he hasn't been arrested. firstly how seriously will the police take this allegation, secondly, the police say they are making inquiries, like what? this could ruin him.

as a mum and granny, ive always been a worrier. if the police charge him, what will happen to him.

thank you in advance

mary

[VHG]

Too early to say what will happen to him.

However because of all the "Jimmy Saville" type stories and Operation Yewtree the Police seem to be clamping down on this sort of thing quite hard.

However the boy may be lying, or the police may decide not to take it to court, so to honest nobody knows what is going to happen.

[VHG]

p.s. As your son was only 11 at the time the police may decide that even if it did happen it was "childhood curiosity" and going to court after all these years may not be worth it.

[Daffy6543]

From personal experience I think they may well proceed with no further action.

[VHG]

One other thing, I am not sure if you have registered on AB with your real name (Mary Devlin) but if you did I don't think it is a good idea to talk about such personal things on AB in case someone on here knows you or your son.

It may be best to get AB to remove this question totally from AB.

[Daffy6543]

Good idea VHG.

[Retrochic]

VHG read the post -the alleged offence happened when the victim was 9 and the alleged perpetrator 11 -he is now 38 therefore the allegations have been brought to the Police by a 36 year old man not a 'boy'.

Mary -at this stage its one mans word against another. The Police will only charge him if they are confident they will have a chance of it going to court, and unless there is concrete evidence, or unless you son has previous convictions I can't see this happening.

[joko]

it depends what hes saying happened i suppose, as vhg says, childhood curiosity or forced sexual assault

he may be lying - maybe thinking hes up for a payout, may have some grievance against your son ... but its possible its true ... no offence but your son is bound to deny it.
however they wont just take the other guys word for it.

[VHG]

>>>>VHG read the post

I am not stupid I did read the post. And if you read my second reply you see I clearly say the person was 11 at the time of the alleged offence.

But even if he is now 38 I still don't think it is a good idea for a person to discuss their son getting questioned by the police on such a delicate matter.

Particularly when the person who has asked the question seems to have registered with their real name, making it easier to identify who the son may be.

[Retrochic]

VHG - My post and your post crossed. In the first post you said " However the boy may be lying, " No one who had understood the post and read it properly would have typed that, as 'the boy' is in ffact a 36 year old man.

I did not call you stupid or infer that you were. If you have an issue with being gently corrected then that's your problem.

[MaryDevlin50]

thank you everyone.

i havent used my real name, thanks for the advice on that.

i agree, thanks to the saville effect, childhood curiosity could now be labelled sexual abuse. we are all devastated by this and i'm looking anywhere for answers.

[Peter Pedant]

well there are no answers yet....

You have had quite alot of "advice" about whether your name really is Mary D and whether you should have posted in your own name. I mean quite honestly what is done is done

First of all - you have to wait and see - you cant influence the decision to charge or not - which is a two stage test and is completely objective . We know this because the DPP tells us it is so.

and I think your son should not talk to the poolice without a lawyer he has hired being present. Money yes I know. Expensive.
I think you just have to close your eyes and pay up ( the lawyers fees )

and good luck

[Canary42]

When you say he hasn't a clue where it is coming from, do you mean he has no recollection of the incident ? It could have just been childish horse-play, with perhaps a slight hint of bullying, but seemingly not an assault to air under the grim atmosphere of Sexual Offending.

[Peter Pedant]

well Canary we DO have a good idea where it has come from...

which would be the alleged victim the then 9 y o.

The issue for me is making unprompted damaging admissions,
such as that weather man last week saying 'oo my writing is awful' before he had admitted the diary he had kept was er his. I admit (ha!) mistake no 1 for that one was compiling the diary in the first place