Can Beauty Be Intimidating?

[andy-hughes]

I watched First Dates Hotel this week, and a lady who appeared on it seemed to underline one of my theories about beautiful women.

She said that if she sees a man she likes, she gives him the eyes, and smiles, the standard 'Come over and say hello ...' signals, and they don't, and she was baffled.

My theory is that some really beautiful women unintentionally intimidate men who think that she is too beautiful to be interested in them, so they shy away from making the first move.

Any thoughts on my theory? Media URL: https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=FIRST+DATES+HOTEL+KELLY&biw=1227&bih=754&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj2jcPqnajRAhXF0RoKHXOrBQkQ_AUICCgD#imgrc=9Yz2Kv0vVpupEM%3A
Description:

[Baldric]

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=FIRST+DATES+HOTEL+KELLY&biw=1227&bih=754&source=lnms&tbm=

[Baldric]

That's ^^ the way to do it!

[B00]

linky not working andy.

Did/does she say she's beautiful?

If i were a bloke, that'd put me off for a start- I think.

[andy-hughes]

Thanks Baldric.

No - in fact she had a bit of a self-image problem because several modelling agencies had rejected her for not being blonde with freckles.

I think the perceived lack of interest from men (explained in my view in the OP) - simply added to her insecurity.

[-Talbot-]

She said that if she sees a man she likes, she gives him the eyes, and smiles, the standard 'Come over and say hello ...' signals, and they don't, and she was baffled.


Is she from Brighton?
Most blokes I know wouldn't care if they thought they were punching above their weight, they would be over in a shot that includes me (once upon a time of course)

[andy-hughes]

Talbot - //Most blokes I know wouldn't care if they thought they were punching above their weight, they would be over in a shot that includes me (once upon a time of course) //

I think it's a matter of self-confidence on the part of the man - if he is confident about himself, he would go over, but a lot of guys are far more shy and insecure than they would ever admit - and I think they are actually the majority.

[Errrrrr]

You are absolutely right andy I have the same problem

[B00]

That her? She's pretty but not beautiful, in my opinion anyway. Maybe the men she's making googly eyes didnt fancy her.

Incidentally, if a woman made eyes like at Mr Boo he'd assume she's got summet in her eye and was trying to blink it out again.

[Cloverjo]

I think beauty can be intimidating. I used to work with a very attractive woman, who found it hard to get a date for the same reason, I guess.

Instead she tried to become friends with men, but some would try to bring her down to their level by teasing her about her nose. She had a slightly large nose, but it suited her face and definitely didn't detract from her beauty.

This is when we were 19 or 20, so I'd hope grown up men wouldn't do that now.

[Old_Geezer]

My theory is that it's wrong to expect someone you fancy to make the first move.

[andy-hughes]

Errrrr - I certainly did as a single man - a woman would have to write 'Come and talk to me ...' in a six-foot fence post and hit me over the head with it before I would!

Actually, that's slightly inaccurate.

I have never had any problem talking to any woman, however attractive - but that's because I start from the premise that she is not going to fancy me, so we can be friends. That works very well, I have had dozens of beautiful friends, but hardly any girlfriends!!!

[RATTER15]

It must be true, the other way around as well, I never have women approach me, probably for the same reason.

Im just so darned handsome especially with my long flowing man mane!!

[andy-hughes]

Cloverjo - //I think beauty can be intimidating. I used to work with a very attractive woman, who found it hard to get a date for the same reason, I guess.

Instead she tried to become friends with men, but some would try to bring her down to their level by teasing her about her nose. She had a slightly large nose, but it suited her face and definitely didn't detract from her beauty.

This is when we were 19 or 20, so I'd hope grown up men wouldn't do that now. //

That sounds like my gender!!

Personally, I am attracted to women with strong features, and I love the fact that the feature a woman has probably loathed through her teens is actually one of the things I find attractive about her.

I would never dream of teasing anyone about something they feel sensitive about - that's just cruel.

[Old_Geezer]

Having looked at the link, she looks ok but it's laughable to suggest anyone but possibly Quasimodo would be put off because she's so beautiful. She a decent looking lass but that's it.

[andy-hughes]

I think she is absolutely gorgeous, and I can see why men would worry that she would simply dismiss them - nothing she said or did gave that impression, it's just an assumption men can call into.

You probably need to see a clip of the show because apart from her looks, she had a really nice voice, and an attractive way of moving as well - these things add to a sense of attraction if there is one.

[Sqad]

\\\\ she is too beautiful to be interested in them, so they shy away from making the first move. \\\\

I just can't see the interest or problem here. They shy away because they feel , quite rightly enough that they are not attractive enough physically to attract the "beautiful" women i.e they think that she may think they are UGLY....and they may well be correct.

Unattractive men can compensate by being famous sportsmen, wealthy, Barristers, famous surgeons, media icons.etc........"you get the picture?"
But an unattractive male nobody, is just that , a nobody and he knows it so will not respond your "the antics of your beautiful woman.
In nature it is called "natural selection".
No big deal.

[Errrrrr]

Ahhh you should have more confidence in yourself, at the end of the day, I think when people are younger they tend to go on looks but as you get older and wiser people do fall for your personality because that is what counts. I like a confident man and am not adverse to being knocked over the head and dragged back to the cave :)

[B00]

Sqad's comment reminds me of this...

http://img.memecdn.com/the-legendary-quote-by-peter-crouch_o_4573933.jpg

[Sqad]

BOO ^^^^ LOL....exactly.

[andy-hughes]

Errrrr - //Ahhh you should have more confidence in yourself, at the end of the day, I think when people are younger they tend to go on looks but as you get older and wiser people do fall for your personality because that is what counts. I like a confident man and am not adverse to being knocked over the head and dragged back to the cave :) //

Very true.

I have learned far more confidence in the fact that my personality and my conversation are attractive to women who are not shallow body fascists - but since I am married, it no longer matters.

That said, were anything to make me single again, I could re-enter the dating scene with far more confidence than I left it thirty-six years ago!