Oh Jesus Christ....

[NoMercy]

My mother is giving me advice re my weekend away.

"Don't forget to do your lady garden."

I just want the ground to open up and swallow me.

[Woody23]

Strewth nobrains. Get a room!

[237SJ]

Tell her you are going to dye it green and get a tattoo that says "please keep off the grass" :)

[Barmaid]

That's just TOO much!!!!!

You should come on here for that sort of advice.

PS: Don't forget to do your lady garden!!!! (My Snag trimmer - as I call it - came with templates to cut patterns into it.For Funks Sake!!!!)

[NoMercy]

Woody... why don't you get a room. Preferably one with lots of padding.

[NoMercy]

Barmaid... I'm only going for the sightseeing....

[mazie]

Mothers, dont you just love em.

How do you do your lady garden???? Mow it, seed it, trim it...what?

Evening NoM, if I dont see you have a great week-end x

[Barmaid]

Do it just in case. You never know when you might need to call an ambulance............

[bibblebub]

how would she know? does it tangled in your shoelaces?

[Eve]

Nooooo! My mum once mentioned "DIY" to me once...mortified!

[boxtops]

As long as there are no weeds in the garden, NoM...:-)

(I won't ask where you're going, people might follow you)

[D_James]

"I just want the ground to open up and swallow me so I go on a public website and let them all know..."

[Fullofsorrow]

I agree with woody23 nomercy. Why on earth would you want to come onto a public forum and talk openly with a bunch of strangers of whom some may be perverts about your private parts/pubic hair begs belief! Keep those private things for your husband boyfriend or girlfriend.

[NoMercy]

Good advice, BM. I'll nair myself just incase of an "emergency"...

Hi Mazie !

[Barmaid]

Its quite different talking about this stuff to anonymous strangers whilst anonymous D_James. I would NOT want to have a similar conversation with my own mother.

[NoMercy]

Fullofsorrow.... I didn't come on here to talk about my private regions... just my embarrassing mother. I'm sure many abers can relate to that. Now go get yourself a drink and calm down...

[maggie21]

eugh!!! what sort of conversation do you have with you`re mother for her to give you advice on trimming you`re hedge!

[mazie]

The majority of us aren't strangers...we didn't join this site today!

[Fullofsorrow]

Whats next a blow by blow account of your menstrual period? A video of you having sex? Photos of you mooning? Where does it stop, children frequent this site for gods sakes.

[Barmaid]

NoM - we all have had them at one point or another! (Embarrassing mothers that is). I have to make do with being an embarrassing step mother. Which is actually better, I can get away with so much more and all her friends KNOW that I will take the P***!

[NoMercy]

Fullofsh!t.... if you are so vehemently opposed to this thread, why are you posting on it?