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sidkid

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sidkid
Feeling a little down earlier so I dipped my muslim friend in bleach. Just trying to lighten Mahmood......
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sidkid
The only country where the locals can get a delicious hotpot, a smashing jumper and a decent shag..... All from the same animal!
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sidkid
A husband and wife came for counselling after 20 years of marriage. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 20...
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sidkid
A man goes into a bookshop and asks the young lady assistant, "Do you have the new book about men with small penises?" She replies, "I'm not sure if it's in yet." "That's the...
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sidkid
A Russian and an Irish wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic gold medal. Before the final match, the Irish wrestler's trainer came to him and said 'Now, don't forget all the research we've...
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sidkid
A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there waiting for the service manager to come take...
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sidkid
'Hello?' 'Hi sweetheart this is Daddy. Is Mommy near the phone?' 'No, Daddy. she's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle George.' After a brief pause, Daddy says,** 'But sweetheart, you haven't got an...
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sidkid
If you receive an email requesting you to open it to "see my meat". Don't.....its spam....
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sidkid
Just seen a fat singer with a laptop. Think it was a Dell.
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sidkid
I love pancake day. It's the only day I can have a quiet crepe and read the newspaper without worrying who sees me.
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sidkid
A drug squad officer stops at a farm in Devon, and talks with an old farmer. He tells the farmer, 'I need to inspect your farm for illegally grown drugs.'The old farmer says, 'Okay, but do not go in...
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sidkid
Whilst preparing dinner last night, I accidentally got some herbs in my eyes. I'm now parsley sighted.....
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sidkid
Just been to the opticians and found out that I'm colour blind. It was a real shock, it came right out of the orange.....
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sidkid
I don't trust mascara...It's out on the lash with a different girl every night.
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sidkid
So, Egyptians without the internet...Gyptians?
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sidkid
Good to see the right thing was done and Andy Gray was sacked by Sky. That kind of sexist caveman mentality is just not acceptable in this day and age. Just hope they replace him with a fit bird with...
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sidkid
I’ve been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.
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sidkid
Whilst taking my postprandial stroll this very clear evening, I was looking at Orion and a question popped into my head. Alnitak (on the left in Orion's Belt) is approximately 800 light years away. If...
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sidkid
An elderly couple were celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighbourhood after they retired. Holding hands, they...
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sidkid
An RAF fighter plane was flying over Afghanistan when he noticed a flying carpet on each side of his plane both with a machine gunner on board. Sensing danger he shot them down. Back at base he got a...

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