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penelope2

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penelope2

My Will...

I was sitting down last night preparing a draft for my Will. I called out to my wife "I'm going to leave everything to you my love". She replied, " What's new, you already do you lazy b*stard"....
18:42 Tue 03rd Dec 20133 answers, last by excelsior-1 20:15 Tue 03rd Dec 2013
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penelope2

Edward John 'johnny' Jackett

Does anybody have any knowledge of any book or biography written about Edward John 'Johnny' Jackett (1878-1935). He was a renowned cyclist in the 1890's for Cornwall, a renowned Rugby Player for...
18:49 Tue 26th Nov 20132 answers, last by penelope2 10:35 Wed 27th Nov 2013
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penelope2

What Relation Is He???

I am trying to work out the relationship of a distant relative to my wife. JJ (1809-1886) was my wife's Gx3 Grandfather. His brother WJ (1812-1878) had a son TJ (1854-?) TJ had a son EJJ (1878-1935)....
16:05 Fri 22nd Nov 20134 answers, last by penelope2 13:37 Sat 23rd Nov 2013
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penelope2

Sad News.

The man who created the chain of Odean cinemas has died, he was 91. His funeral is next Tuesday at 2:10, 4:30, 6:40 and 9:10pm....
17:34 Wed 20th Nov 20133 answers, last by weecalf 19:21 Sat 23rd Nov 2013
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penelope2

Celebration.

I tried one of those Football Celebrations today, you know the one where you run like mad and then slide along on your knees. Unfortunately, I didn''t anticipate the slippery floor and crashed...
09:42 Mon 18th Nov 20133 answers, last by BlueToffee 19:55 Mon 18th Nov 2013
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penelope2

Turkish Bath House....

I was in Turkey on holiday and came across one of those Turkish Bath Houses. They shaved with a solid steel stoneground razor, clipped inside the ears,snipped out the nose hairs, waxed off chest hairs...
07:48 Sun 20th Oct 20132 answers, last by Grandma_Yiddo 17:41 Sun 20th Oct 2013
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penelope2

I'm A Celebrity...

Yoko Ono has signed up for the next series of 'I'm a Celebrity get me out of here'. Show bosses think she will do very well since she's been living off a dead beatle for the last thirty years.
16:39 Fri 04th Oct 20131 answer, last by excelsior-1 13:34 Sat 05th Oct 2013
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penelope2

I Got Sacked.......

I got sacked last night from the Salvation Army Soup Kitchen, ungrateful buggers, all i said was "hurry up for f**ks sake some of us have got homes to go to"!...
16:14 Fri 04th Oct 20133 answers, last by tonyav 22:47 Fri 04th Oct 2013
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penelope2

I Was At Work....

I was at work yesterday when a female colleague asked me what my 'ring tone' was. I said "light brown like everyone else's" Woman are certainly much more forward these days!...
16:10 Fri 04th Oct 20134 answers, last by frugalfred 22:47 Fri 04th Oct 2013
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penelope2

Viagra

Last night I reached for my liquid Viagra and accidently swigged from a bottle of Tippex. I woke up this morning with a huge correction....
16:07 Fri 04th Oct 20135 answers, last by Baldric 16:40 Fri 04th Oct 2013
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penelope2

Mother In Law.

The wife phoned me today and said "You'd better come to the hospital, my mother hasn't got long to live, she could be dead by tomorrow". I replied "But Man U are playing Man City and it's on tv". She...
11:18 Thu 03rd Oct 20132 answers, last by frugalfred 18:43 Thu 03rd Oct 2013
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penelope2

The Old Man...

One day Jesus was walking past the Pearly Gates when St. Peter ask him to watch the gates for a few minutes. Jesus agreed and within a few minutes he saw an old man approach. He walked very slowly,...
15:57 Tue 01st Oct 20132 answers, last by Psybbo 22:21 Tue 01st Oct 2013
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penelope2

Chess Enthusiasts.

A group of chess enthusiasts were kicked out of a hotel reception area for discussing their winning games. Apparently the manager can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer....
19:23 Mon 23rd Sep 20138 answers, last by Carlos21 12:11 Wed 18th Apr 2018
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penelope2

Dryjanuary

25 days into DryJanuary. Weight loss,doing quite well (+ saving plenty on abstinence from the wine). How are other people doing?
17:35 Fri 25th Jan 20134 answers, last by penelope2 15:38 Tue 29th Jan 2013
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penelope2

I Went Out Last Night.......

I went out last night to celebrate the last night of the world with three of my mates, drinking,singing etc. This morning when we woke up, we all had horribly sore throats. The legends are true - we...
15:01 Fri 21st Dec 20128 answers, last by tonyav 17:30 Fri 21st Dec 2012
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penelope2

Aavm Subsystem.rpc Error.

I'm trying to insert a License File for Avast! When I attempt this it shows:- "Unable to insert License File, The AAVM subsystem detected a RPC error" Can any knowledgeable person explain what this...
19:03 Wed 19th Dec 20125 answers, last by penelope2 20:38 Wed 19th Dec 2012

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